In the end, he wanted me to be with him. So, now I stood at what might be a thousand feet above sea level, attempting to suck oxygen into my straining lungs.
“You okay?” Chase asked, concern causing his brow to crease.
“I’m… good,” I lied, so he wouldn’t worry.
“You sure?”
I nodded and took a sip from my water bottle. “I’m ready whenever you are.” I watched him carefully pull the urn out of his backpack. “Are you ready? If you’re not, Chase, we can do this another time. It doesn’t have to be today. It doesn’t even have to be tomorrow or in this decade. I don’t even mind if you want to keep his remains in the urn and display it where you can see it.”
Swallowing hard enough to be visible, he dropped his backpack on the ground and hugged the plain stainless-steel urn to his chest. “I appreciate that but we’re here now. Let’s do this.”
“You can change your mind.”
“No.” He turned his dark brown eyes to mine. “I’m not going to change my mind. About anything.”
I studied him a few more seconds. His determination to get this over with today could be seen in the tightness of his jaw. “Okay.” I just didn’t want him to regret his decision afterward. Once he threw the ashes into the wind, there was no getting them back.
I helped him remove the cremains from the urn and open the bag, then I stepped back to give him his space.
His lips moved as he said something—possibly goodbye—and then opened the bag. Turning it over, he shook out the ashes. The breeze picked them up and swept them away in a cloud of dust.
Ashes to ashes. Dust to dust.
My heart ached as he stood there for the longest time. My guess was he was hiding his tears from me even though I, too, experienced a sharp sting and some blurry vision. But if he needed that privacy, if he needed to take a moment or even hours, I could wait. I was a pro at that now.
When he extended his hand behind him and toward me without turning, I moved forward, grabbed it and came around to face him, careful not to get too close to the edge of the rock formation on which we stood.
While the tears might now be dry, the proof they had existed remained.
“It was time to let go.”
I didn’t agree or disagree since that wasn’t my decision.
“Remember what I said at the Christmas party? He’ll always be here.” I pressed my hand over his heart the same way I did that night. It beat slow and steady under my palm. Completely shattered once, it was now close to being whole again.
“I know. Even though I say this often, it needs to be said again here and now… I appreciate everything you’ve done to help me get to this point. For sticking by my side no matter how much I resisted, no matter how I treated you.”
“I appreciate you not slugging me while I helped.”
He yanked on my hand, turning me around before pulling me back against him, so we both faced the valley and the lake below us. Wrapping his arms around me, he leaned his chin on my shoulder while we stood together and took in our home.
After what might have been fifteen minutes of us simply standing in silence, he said softly, “I have something important to tell you.”
My heart seized. With a thump, it restarted and began to beat rapidly. “I’ve heard this somewhere before.”
“Yes, you have.”
“Does it have to do with a contract and a big fat check?” I asked.
“No, but it does have to do with a commitment.”
“Too late. You can’t send Onyx back to her breeder. No give backs.”
He shook his head. “She’s not going anywhere. Neither is Timber. And… neither are you.”
One side of my mouth pulled up. Besides my racing heart, my blood was rushing through my veins in anticipation. What he was about to say could be what I’d been waiting for.
“I love you, Rett.” After he whispered those three very small but very important words to me, I knew right then and there I was finally done waiting. Especially after he added, “Now and forever.”
We had not only physically climbed a mountain and reached the summit today, we did it in our relationship, too.
EPILOGUE
FINDING THE LIGHT
Chase
I pulled the Bronco in front of The Next Page and shut off the engine. Since it was almost closing time, I had no idea why Rett wanted me to drive all the way into town instead of just telling me whatever he needed to tell me on the phone or when he got home.
As soon as I climbed out of the Ford, Onyx began barking in excitement as she bounced around the back cargo area. I had to install a cargo net to keep her back there since she thought, even as a ninety-pound puppy, she could still fit in my lap when I drove.