I look over at him briefly to flash him a tiny smile. “Yeah, of course.”
“You seemed a little freaked out back there.”
I meet his gaze more steadily, even though it makes my stomach hurt to utter my next words. “I don’t kiss guys who have girlfriends.”
“Even girlfriends you don’t like?”
“Even girlfriends I absolutely hate,” I verify.
He nods, looking more like he’s been handed new information about me to file away than offended. “Got it.”
We head back up to his house to get my school bag, no doubt dropped off by one of his nerd soldiers.
I’m horrified to learn it’s past four o’clock.
Mom hasn’t texted me to see where I am, so I’m also a little worried.
Dare takes me home, but the ride is much quieter.
I already miss the beach. The sunset I’ll never get to watch with him.
I know I can’t go back there. I never should have been there in the first place. Logically, I know I don’t belong in Dare’s world, and I certainly don’t belong in his arms.
I thank him for the ride as I open the door to climb out, but I feel a little uncertain about things since I did sort of reject him.
“You’re still picking me up tomorrow, right?”
“Of course.”
Relief floods me. Because he doesn’t seem to hate me, or because I have a ride to school? I don’t know, maybe both.
Whatever the case, I’m glad I’ll see him tomorrow once this awkwardness has passed and my brain isn’t swimming in rum.
Chapter twelve
Aubrey
I’m wearing black jeans and a long-sleeved, mauve top when Dare pulls up in front of my house this morning.
My stupid heart is so happy to see him.
I ignore it as I climb into his matte black Audi, not struggling to get my bag in the floor today while maintaining my modesty since I wore jeans.
Dare’s gaze still lingers on my legs as if they’re bare, then slides to my face in that deliberate way of his. “Good morning.”
“Hey,” I say back, grabbing the seat belt and pulling it across my body.
He waits for me to secure it, then he shifts the car into drive and we’re off.
It’s a little chilly this morning, so the windows are rolled up. Not like yesterday.
Once I sobered up, the whole of yesterday started to seem batshit crazy. Kissing someone else’s boyfriend in the ocean? I couldn’t describe a scene less characteristic of something I would do if I actively tried.
I’m hesitant to blame it on the alcohol, but I did drink a lot of it.
Thankfully, it’s a short ride to school, but it feels longer today with an invisible third passenger.
Awkwardness.
Oh, how I hate it.
When he pulls into his spot and turns off the engine, part of me regrets wasting our last car ride together not talking.
A small, shameful part of me also hoped things would go much differently. I know it’s insane because we’re just getting to know each other, but since he seems not to even like Anae… I don’t know, some part of me hoped maybe he would be playful and comfortable when I got in the car this morning, and when I wondered why he didn’t feel as awkward about it as I did, he would tell me he broke up with her. Not for me, necessarily, but because after some soul-searching, he realized he wouldn’t even be kissing some other girl on his private beach if he actually liked the one he was with.
None of that happens.
The discomfort doesn’t seem to bother him.
Before we get out, he finally says, “Since I imagine I won’t be seeing you at lunch today, the shop said your car would be done by two. I told them to deliver it to my parking spot so you’d know where to find it.”
“Oh. But we’re in your parking spot.”
“Just dropping you off,” he tells me. “I’ll park somewhere else today.”
“That’s really nice of you. Thanks.”
“You’re welcome,” he says. “If my car gets scratched, I’m blaming you, though.”
I crack a smile at the return of playfulness to his tone. “That’s fair.”
I finally allow myself to look over at him, and that thought echoes through my mind again.
I miss you.
It’s absurd to miss someone who is sitting right beside me, even more absurd to miss someone I barely know, and yet…
“Maybe…” I shut my mouth, wishing I hadn’t opened it. “No, never mind.”
“What?”
“Nothing.”
My stupid ass wants to have lunch with him again. Not even necessarily leaving the school like we did yesterday, but just spending time with him wherever. I could bring my bagged lunch, he could grab something from the lunch line.
And what? Sit together in the cafeteria and have a grand old time while Anae watches and doesn’t mind at all?
He presses again, but I tell him nothing and pull the latch to let myself out of the car before I say something really stupid.