Tell her.Tell her you made a promise to Luca. Tell her you want to screw her more than life itself, but honour and loyalty prevent that from being possible. Tell her this isn’t about her, that it’s you.
‘I see. I thought that might be the case. I mean, you have sex all the time, you probably barely even remember me, but for me, you’re just—I mean—I guess I have no clue about it. Is it always like that?’
This was going from bad to worse. If the conversation devolved into talking about the finer points of that night he would forget his own name, let alone Luca’s.
‘There are other men, more suitable men, to gain experience with.’
She narrowed her eyes suspiciously. ‘More suitable how?’
‘More inclined to relationships, for one.’
‘But that’s just it.’ Her eyes flashed to his. ‘I don’t want a relationship. That’s not what I’m suggesting.’
His gut tightened. ‘You make no sense.’
‘Why? You think it’s so impossible that a woman should want to live like you do? Okay, not quite like you do, but to have a physical relationship without making a commitment?’
‘No. But I don’t think that’s who you are.’
She didn’t fight him on that point. ‘You don’t get it. For reasons that are too complex to go into, I have to get married before I turn twenty-five, which is in a little over a year.’
She was so young. Even without all the other issues, her age was something he should have paid more attention to. The women he usually went for were closer in age to him—thirty, at least. Uneasiness spread through him.
‘You know my feelings on marriage?’
‘Yes. I’m not suggesting we get married.’ She paled visibly, the idea clearly appalling to her. He wondered at that, almost wanted to fight against it on principle—ego, he presumed. ‘I need to marry someone, and it would be better if it’s not someone I fancy. That would complicate things. I want a husband I can be friends with, but nothing more.’
He stared at her as though she’d sprouted a second head, and then a third.
‘As I said, it’s complicated.’ She waved a hand through the air. ‘But before I get married, I want to...’ She paused, looking away from him for a moment, then forcing her eyes back to his defiantly. ‘I want to know everything I can about sex. To experience it fully.’
‘Absolutely not.’ He issued the denial swiftly, before he could forget common sense, his obligations to Luca, and every damned reason he had to resist this, and pull her into his arms.
She opened her mouth to protest and then closed it again. Her eyes held his, but there was the smallest slump in her shoulders that made his chest feel hollowed out. A protective instinct he hadn’t known in a long time, but that he now realised Sienna invoked, oh, so easily whipped through him. ‘Okay, fair enough. I guess it was worth a shot.’ She forced a small smile to her face and then skirted around him—far around him—before placing her empty glass on the corner of his desk. She stared at it for several seconds, then slowly pirouetted back towards him. ‘Please keep my request between us. I still haven’t mentioned anything to Olivia—I don’t want her to know any of this.’
He watched her walk towards his door, her back straight, her shoulders squared, and he counted each of her steps, aware that within seconds she’d be gone, out of his life, that the risk would be over. He should have been relieved. He needed this temptation like a hole in the head. But as she approached the door, he felt a surge of adrenaline, a rush of panic, and he knew, even then, that he was losing this fight, and that scared the hell out of him.
‘Sienna, wait. Let me explain.’ His voice was low and kind, so her heart splintered into a thousand and one pieces. What a fool she’d been! As if he could ever feel the same way about her as she did him! Sexual infatuation had gripped her for a long month, tormenting her, but Alejandro Corderó was no stranger to that unique pleasure. He’d had a lot of lovers, if the internet was to be believed. He was hardly pining away for her, wondering about her, waiting for her to swing by his office and ask him to make love to her. How utterly excruciating.
It is a good thing you are smart, Sienna. Your looks are certainly not going to be your success.
‘There’s no need.’ She was as grateful as anything when she reached the door, curving her fingers around the handle. ‘I understand.’
‘No, you don’t.’
‘You regretted sleeping with me. Despite my inexperience, that much was obvious.’
His eyes flashed with hers, anger obvious, sparks flecking from him to her and then he was cutting across the office, making short work of the distance, his broad frame right in front of hers so she felt waves of desire and heat buffet her from all sides.
‘This is not a question of whether or not I want to sleep with you again. I do.’
She rolled her eyes. ‘Please. Don’t feel the need to let me down gently. I would always prefer honesty.’
‘As would I.’ He caught her chin and tilted her face up, so her body jolted with the sheer pressure of awareness. ‘So I am being honest with you. This is complicated, not least because of our connection through Luca and Olivia.’
‘What difference does that make?’
He stared down at her, his eyes probing hers, reading her, his lips parted, his body tense, and she moaned softly, because this was impossible.
‘Look, Alejandro, just forget I came here. You’re right. There are other guys I can approach, other men who’ll—’
It was as if something snapped inside him. His nostrils flared and then a second later he was right in front of her, temper barely contained. ‘Other men? You dare come in here and talk to me about other men—’
‘You’re the one who said there’d be someone more suitable—’
‘I was wrong.’ And then he was kissing her, but not as she’d ever been kissed before.
This was a kiss of white-hot possession, a kiss designed to mark her, to change her, and ultimately to claim her. She shivered into his embrace, into the hoarse, Catalan words he groaned into her mouth and she surrendered to him even as she felt a thrill of pleasure, because beyond surrender was the thrill of victory and she let it claim her soul, piece by delicious piece.