His eyes closed. “I didn’t understand how pervasive our love would be. I didn’t get then what I know now: loving each other has changed us. Whether you’re here or there, divorced or married, you will always be a part of me, and I’ll always be different for having loved you.” He leaned closer, as though he couldn’t help himself. “And I’m glad. I love you. Not because of this baby,” his eyes dropped to her stomach and held there, as disbelief shaped his features. “But because of who you are.”
Her eyes swept shut as feelings she couldn’t quite believe began to bubble inside her.
“That night in the desert, I was an idiot. I was faced with the spectre of losing you so tried to strong arm you into staying. It scared the hell out of me, that I could even suggest I would do something like that. I was desperate.”
“That’s why you sent me away?”
“Hell, yes. I had to save you from me.”
“I’ve never needed saving from you,” she denied fiercely. “I can more than handle you, Zafar.”
His features didn’t change.
“I have been terrified of our marriage,” she admitted quietly. “And counting the minutes until we could divorce.”
He made a gruff sound, deep in his throat.
“Come on, Zafar. Surely you can understand that?” She prodded, because she was secure now and able to tease him, just a little.
“Yes.” His eyes, haunted, locked to hers, and she gasped, because she’d been wrong. She couldn’t tease him. Not when he’d come to her, baring his soul. She scrambled up to her knees as quickly as her girth would allow, moving across the mattress to him, cupping his cheek with her palm.
“Loving someone with all your heart who refuses to admit they love you back is a form of torture, don’t you know?” She moved closer, pressing their foreheads together. “Being married to that person is even worse.”
He was very quiet, and very still. Only the rapid moving of his chest showed that her words had found their mark.
“I love you,” she said, for simplicity and clarity. “Always have, always will. The only reason I wanted to divorce you was because of self-preservation.”
“But knowing that I love you—,” he asked, again, that sense of vulnerability in his voice that made her ache for him. To see a strong, macho guy like this broken down truly made her want to cry.
“Changes everything,” she assured him.
“Not everything. Our past, the hurt I inflicted on you, I was wrong—,”
“You’d been wronged,” she said simply, pressing her palm to his chest. “You were trying to earn your father’s approval, to prove to him and the country that you would put them first. I get it.”
“You’re far too forgiving.”
“Oh, I didn’t say I forgive you,” she said, softening the words with a smile. “Only that I understand.”
Their eyes locked and suddenly he was all-powerful Sheikh once more, and she was so glad for that. A spark of awareness ignited in her belly, spreading through her body.
“Do you think in time you may learn to forgive me, if I play my cards right?” He asked, moving closer, his lips brushing hers.
“You’d have to spend a long time making it up to me,” she joked.
“A lifetime?”
“For a start,” she admitted on a small sigh.
And he brought his body around hers, moving to kiss her, but before he did, he sobered, his eyes probing hers. “I’m truly sorry, Amelia. For as long as we live, I never want you to doubt my love again. There is nothing in this world I would not give you.”
“I know.” And she did. In her heart, she’d always known. That was why his rejection had hurt so damned much. If she’d had doubts about the truth of what they’d shared, maybe she could have walked away. But Zafar was her everything—and finally, he’d admitted that.
She was already in heaven, but when he made love to her, gently, perfectly, reverently, and so completely, she felt as though she’d left the earth, and become a star all on her own, sparkling high in the sky for all time. She was glowing; she was content. And she knew she always would be.
Hours later,when the sun rose, it truly felt like the dawning of a new day. Millie woke and stretched, turning to face Zafar, who was right where he’d been when she’d fallen asleep—at her side. Except now, he was also awake, watching her, smiling, a smile that reached his eyes and touched her heart, a smile that could change the world.
“I love you,” he said, shaking his head and laughing a little. “I can’t believe I can just say that now.”