Brandy
Standing on my front porch last night with Diesel had me thinking about all kinds of things. Things I shouldn’t be thinking about. I would be crazy to think there’s any kind of future with a biker. I’ve seen firsthand that they’re not the settling-down type. But even knowing that, I can’t help but wonder what would have happened if Diesel had kissed me. At least I thought he was going to.
And that’s what I thought about all night. I guess it’s a good thing because if I wasn’t thinking about Diesel and the fact he didn’t kiss me, I’d been thinking about everything that happened with Axle, and there’s no way I’m ready to process all that.
After a sleepless night and then cleaning my house this morning and avoiding questions from my Uncle Thomas, I get ready to leave for work. I’m both nervous and even a little excited. Nervous because a part of me doesn’t believe that they just kicked Axle out of the club and excited because I want to see Diesel again to see if I’d imagined all the sexual tension between the two of us.
I walk through the big front doors. It’s early afternoon, and things won’t get kicking around here for a few hours, but there are a few people sitting at tables around the clubhouse. I nervously look around. I’ve already decided that if Axle is here, I’ll just turn around and walk back out. There’s no way I’ll work here if he’s around.
I get farther into the clubhouse when I hear my name called from across the room. Pres is sitting at a table with Scout. I take a deep breath and walk toward them. This is it, I think. They’re going to fire me.
“Hey, Pres. Hey, Scout.” I give them a little wave and then drop my hand, feeling foolish.
Pres doesn’t show emotion. He points at the chair between him and Scout, and I sit down in it.
He’s looking at me, but I feel like he’s not happy about it. His whole demeanor is tense as he starts to talk. “You were hurt last night at the hands of this club. I know an apology is not going to change anything, but I want you to know that we don’t approve of Axle’s actions, and he’s been dealt with. He won’t bother you again.”
I open my mouth to speak, but he holds his hand up. “I’m not finished.”
My eyes widen, and I nod my head. I look at Scout, and he’s smiling at me encouragingly.
Pres puts his arms on the table in front of him and leans toward me. “I know the shit you’re dealing with from your father’s incarceration. I’m sure you’ve heard by now that we’re opening a club in Whiskey Run, Tennessee. Half the brothers from here are moving there, myself, Diesel, and Scout included. You have the option to stay on here if you wish, but if you want a fresh start, you’re more than welcome to join us in Tennessee.”
When he’s done, I quietly stare at him, trying to process everything. Only when he leans back, crosses his arms over his chests, and says, “You can speak now” do I ask the first question on my mind. “Uh, if I move to Tennessee, what would I be doing?”
His forehead creases. “What you’ve been doing here.”
I nod. “Uh, yeah, but Ashley said that only cherries are going, and uhm, I’m not interested in being a cherry.”
Pres smiles and shakes his head. “So you probably don’t know this about me, but not much scares me.”
I nod. “I can see that.”
He’s still smiling. “But yeah, the thought of telling Diesel I’d invited you on the trip as a cherry scares me. It’s not going to happen. So if you go, you would be doing what you’re doing now and working for Scout.”
I’m too shocked to speak, so I only nod. I start to get up, and Pres says, “I really am sorry about Axle. Are you, uh—are you okay?”
I nod. I’ve always thought that Pres was sort of an ass. I’ve heard rumblings about why he doesn’t like women, and I guess I understand it. We all have our hangups, I guess. But all in all, he seems like a decent guy. “Yeah, I’m fine.”
He nods, and I look at Scout. “Where do you want me to get started?”
“We’re doing a meal later when the crew gets back. Can you start some meal prep?”
I’m already walking toward the kitchen. “I’m on it.”
I get to the kitchen and start grabbing things from the refrigerator. The menu for tonight is written on the dry erase board, and I see we’re doing a taco buffet for tonight. I start cutting vegetables and prepping the meat, all while thinking about Diesel. The night goes on, and the bikers come in at different times. Obviously, they were on a run tonight, but I never ask any questions. I think the less I know, the better.
Every time the big front doors open, I’m holding my breath, waiting to see Diesel come in. The longer the night goes, the more antsy I get. At this point, I feel as if I’ve imagined every caressing look, the possessive feel of having his arms around me, the caring look in his eyes. I’m sure he would do any of those things for any woman that had been through what I’d been through.
Finally, the last of the guys start to come in, and when Diesel walks through the door, I can’t keep the smile from my face. He stands out from the rest of the guys, probably due to his size. I see him looking around the room and freeze, wondering if he’s looking for me. He’s almost looking at me when Peggy, one of the cherries, walks up to him and puts her hand on his arm. He smiles down at her, and a giant pit forms in my stomach. I should have fuckin’ known. Damn, I’m so stupid sometimes. It sucks too, because Peggy was actually one of the women I sort of liked.
I turn before anyone can see the pained expression on my face. I work at condensing the buffet table. There’s still plenty of food left, and I’m putting pans together trying to keep busy. I completely ignore Diesel. I know I’m being childish. Technically, he didn’t do anything wrong. It’s not like we’re dating or anything.
I pick up the pans and turn to go to the kitchen, and Diesel’s standing in front of me. I look at his chest to avoid his eyes. “Do you want a beer?”
He pauses for a minute. “Uh, sure.”
I nod, walking past him. I put all the plates and pans on the counter and then go out front to grab a beer for him. I take a deep breath and set it down in front of him. He and some are the guys are talking, so I walk away without a word.