CHAPTER FOURTEEN
TORITURNEDANDmarched away from the window into the shadows.
Ashraf wanted to follow and haul her close.
He didn’t do it. If he touched her his good intentions would collapse and he wouldn’t release her.
He swallowed and it felt as if he’d swallowed a desert of sand, his mouth so dry the action tore his throat to shreds.
This was the cost of releasing the one woman he’d ever cared for.The one woman he could ever love.
That, above all, gave him the strength to weld his feet to the floor.
He loved Tori. Loved her with such devotion that watching her struggle with his decision felt like the most difficult thing he’d ever done. Harder than facing the threat of death at Qadri’s hands.
What would it be like, living the rest of his life without her?
The laceration in his throat became a raw ache that descended to his chest, intensifying to a sharper pain with each breath.
But he had to protect her. In his arrogance he’d assumed they’d face the scandal together. That it would be directed athim, with his notorious past, and that Tori would be seen as a victim of his licentious ways. He hadn’t bargained on her being represented as some...
He frowned. Was that a sob?
Tori stood with her back to him, facing the courtyard. Her shoulders were straight but her head was bent. As he watched another quiver passed through her.
Seconds later he was behind her, hands lifted but not touching those slim shoulders. ‘Tori, are you all right?’
Stupid question. Of course she wasn’t. But how could he comfort her?
‘Does it matter?’
Her steady voice made him feel, if possible, worse. ‘It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have let this happen.’
‘Which? Suggesting marriage or fathering Oliver?’ She snorted. ‘Don’t answer that. Clearly you regret both.’
‘No!’ His fingers closed on her shoulders and he gritted his teeth, fighting the need to spin her round and into his arms. To hold her properly one last time. ‘You can’t think that.’
‘There are a lot of things you control, Ashraf, but what I think isn’t one of them.’
‘Parting is for the best.’ How he wished there were another way.
‘Whose best? Yours? Not Oliver’s or mine.’ She shrugged from his hold and swung to face him.
Ashraf stared into eyes that glittered with tears she refused to let fall. For the first time he felt himself to be the failure his father had accused him of being.
The one woman in the world he wanted to protect from harm and he’d brought her infamy and scandal. The sight of her, brim-full with pain, knotted his conscience and stole his resolution.
‘Don’t lie, Ashraf. Just say it. It’s too risky for your crown to take on a woman with a bastard son, even if you’re his father.’
His breath hissed at the words and her eyes narrowed.
‘That’s it, isn’t it?’
For a second she stood stock-still, eyes wide. He’d seen the victim of an accidental gunshot look exactly the same—that moment of disbelief before he crumpled to the ground. But Tori didn’t crumple. She turned and stalked to the bedroom.
‘It won’t take me long to pack. We’ll leave today.’
It was what he wanted. What was best for Tori. Yet Ashraf couldn’t let her do it. He was too selfish.