Yes, there were always consequences, and not once, but on three separate occasions he had not taken the level of care he usually would, relying on her to take the Pill. It was his own fault entirely and he would handle this with grace, even if a pregnancy was everything he had always dreaded.
Gian did not know how he felt.
When she arrived in his office, she was most un-Ariana-like.
Her dress was crumpled, her espadrilles tied haphazardly, her hair, dared he say it, a day past needing a wash, and her make-up but a distant memory. And yet, to his eyes, this was the real Ariana, the one who shot straight to his heart. To see her so fragile and clearly distraught had him fighting not to go straight over and take her in his arms.
Instead, for now, he kept his arms to himself.
‘Ariana.’ He rose to greet her and they did the kiss-kiss routine she had referred to so painfully in their last conversation. He gestured for her to take a seat as they both tried to go back to a world where they hadn’t done more. ‘Can I offer you some refreshments?’
‘No, no...’ She shook her head. ‘Thank you, though.’
‘Some champagne?’ Gian suggested. ‘A bottle this time.’
But she did not smile at his little reference and instead shook her head. ‘No, thank you.’ She took a breath. It wasn’t just La Fiordelise and the oasis he made that calmed her; it was Gian himself.
Despite there being so much on her mind, there was a chance to pause, to just sit in the calming low light of his office and take a moment.
That was what he gave her.
Always.
This tiny chance to pause, and it was in that moment Ariana knew that she really did want things resolved between them. No matter her blushes, it was time to face things head on.
‘Before I say what I came to say—’ before he got angry about Nicki ‘—I just want to clear the air. I’m sorry for asking you to miss Dante’s wedding. It wasn’t fair of me to do that.’
‘There were extenuating circumstances and it was right that you did,’ Gian said. ‘I’m sure we’ll get to managing steely politeness at family gatherings soon.’
‘Yes!’ She shot out a laugh and tried to glimpse a time when she wouldn’t want him, but it was such an impossible thought that her smile slid away.
‘Dante understood,’ Gian said. ‘The wedding was at such short notice. He dropped by the other day, we had lunch, and he told me about the twins. So we’re all good...’ He was so certain that Ariana was here to tell him she was pregnant that he kindly gave her an opening. His eyes never left her face as he watched carefully for her reaction. ‘Twins must run in the family...’
‘Oh, please.’ Ariana gave a mirthless laugh. ‘Twins don’t run in my family, Gian. I assume my mother had more than one egg put back. Anything to keep up the charade!’
‘It wasn’t all a charade, Ariana.’
‘I know that now.’ She gave him a thin smile.
‘Are you talking?’
‘Of course we are,’ Ariana said. ‘I am hurt, yes, but I love her.’
Lucky Angela, Gian thought, to have her Ariana’s unconditional love.
A love he himself had discarded.
‘I have something for you,’ Ariana told him. ‘I’ve been sorting out some of my father’s things...’ She handed him a leather-bound book as she explained what she had done in recent days. ‘I’ve made one each for my brothers and one for my mother. The contents are different in each, of course...’ She was talking a little too fast, as she did when she was embarrassed, unsure if he would even want her gift.
‘An album?’
‘Yes, there were a lot of photos, and I thought you might like the ones you were in. But please don’t look at it now: that’s not what I’m here for...’ She took a breath. ‘Gian, there’s something I have to tell you. I wasn’t going to; I’ve tried to deal with it myself, but you do deserve to know...’
Gian braced himself to hear the inevitable.
‘I’ve had my suspicions for a couple of weeks.’ Ariana’s voice was barely above a whisper, and she cleared her throat. ‘I should perhaps have come to you sooner but I wanted to be sure myself...’
‘You could have come to me,’ Gian said. ‘You can always come to me. You know that.’