Lyra didn’t completely understand what was going on with the Bulls and her family, and Reed had sworn her to absolute secrecy with the few tidbits he’d shared last night, so she said nothing about it now.
“Then why are you so distracted? You’ve been grunting at me all afternoon. I swear, you sound like your father. I knew if you stayed with him ... “
She faded out before finishing that sentence. Since it couldn’t possibly be going anywhere good, Lyra went ahead and let it die right there.
But there was something she had to say.Hadto say. She hooked the steamer head up and turned the machine off. Finally, she turned all her attention to her mother. “Okay. There is something. But I’m worried to tell you.”
Mom’s aspect changed entirely, all at once. She gave up frustration and came over to hook her arm over Lyra’s shoulders. “Don’t be worried, baby. You can tell me anything. You know I’ll help you however I can.”
Oh god, this was going to hurt. “It’s not something wrong for me, Mom.”
A frown pulled Mom’s brows together. “For who, then?”
Marshaling all her courage, Lyra said, “It’s about Wade.”
Mom’s frown deepened, and her arm dropped from Lyra’s shoulders. “Wade? What about him?”
The only thing Lyra could think to do was say it as succinctly and directly as possible. “You know your cookout a couple weeks ago?”
“Sure ...”
Her nerve almost failed her, but she pushed on. “He made a pass at me.”
Mom only stared. She stood exactly as she was. Her expression didn’t change. If Lyra had snapped her fingers and performed a magic spell to freeze her mother in time, the effect would have been the same.
That stunned, painful stasis continued for ten seconds ... fifteen ... “Mom?”
Mom blinked. Then swallowed. But still didn’t move.
“Mom?”
“What do you mean, ‘made a pass’?”
It was easier to say it now that she’d taken the first leap, but it was still dangerous. Trying not to dodge in any way, to be clear and direct as possible, Lyra explained, “When I went in to get the tablecloth. I was in the laundry room, trying to reach the shelf. Wade came in and stood behind me, reaching over me to get it, and—”
“So he was being helpful.”
“I’m not done, Mom. He got the tablecloth down, and I said thanks. That was fine. But he wouldn’t step back and give me room. He stood there, right behind me, looming over me. Then he started playing with my hair. When I tried to push him away and turn to leave, he grabbed me and pushed me back until I was kind of wedged into that space next to the dryer. He said a bunch of stuff like he was trying to get something going, and then he grabbed my belt and started trying to open it. I shoved him as hard as I could and got away.”
Another painful stretch of frozen time. When her mother finally spoke, Lyra’s heart broke a little. “So ... he didn’t kiss you or cop a feel? He just got a little too close?”
“Mama. He had his hands in my hair. He said stuff about how pretty I was, how good I looked in my shorts, how good I smelled. And then he shoved me into a tight space and started to undo my belt. I think that counts as copping a feel.”
“But you didn’t try to get away before then? If it upset you so much, why didn’t you say anything before now?”
Lyra dropped her head. She felt both blindsided and unsurprised. Why hadn’t she said anything before now? Because she’d been afraid of the reaction. That day, it was the middle of her mom’s party, and there were more than a dozen guests milling about. She hadn’t wanted to cause a scene and even more humiliation for her mother (and herself). Thereafter, she’d worried about hurting her mom. She’d entertained a small fear that she wouldn’t be believed, but really, she’d been pretty sure she would be—just that she’d break her mother’s heart.
Maybe she had. But now her mom was breaking hers right back.
It was all she could do not to apologize, but Michelle was right; Lyra was not at fault, and apologizing for telling her mother something she needed to know would be taking blame that belonged elsewhere. Even answering the question her mother had asked would be accepting blame she didn’t deserve.
There was no point to continuing the conversation, and there was no coming back from it, at least not right now. Lyra sighed.
“Okay. You do what you like with the information. I’m gonna go.”
“That’s probably best.”
Yeah. Two hearts were taking serious blows here.