“TheBottom”—DevourTheDay
Iwasn’t lying when I told him Lila had died that night. Sometimes, I barely remembered what she was like. Yet the second Lucian kissed me, I was rocketed back to the couple we were all those years ago.
Despite the changes time had wrought in us both, my body simplyknewhis. His taste was like coming home, and the sweep of his tongue against mine set my blood on fire. I’d never stopped loving him, and I knew it, but I’d had no idea how much my body had craved his touch for over eleven years.
In that single scorching kiss, I realized why sex had always been mediocre since him. It was because when you’ve had the other half of your soul inside you, nothing ever compares.
My fingers clutched his shirt, and a whimper started in my throat—the place his hand was still locked around as if he owned me.
Evidently, it was enough to break whatever spell had befallen us, because he broke free, and we were left gasping for oxygen. He dipped his head down to rest his forehead on mine.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that,” he said hoarsely.
My brain was so addled that at first, I couldn’t form words. Then I remembered the blonde at the bar, and I was mortified. He was with someone, and we’d kissed like we might as well have been fucking. With jerky movements, I stepped back and broke his hold.
“Shit. I’m sorry too. Your…” I wasn’t sure what to call her. “Um, she… I….” I stuttered before clearing my throat.
His expression grew confused, then awareness dawned in his eyes. “Laila, Cookie isn’t my girl.”
“Well, you were certainly cozy, so I’m not sure she sees it that way,” I said, unable to keep the snide quality out of my tone. Though I hated to admit it, I was jealous as hell. In my heart, he was mine and always would be. When I hadn’t known where he was, it was easier to pretend he was waiting for me somewhere, and as soon as they found my parents’ killers, I’d be able to go to him. It was my fairy tale, but it seemed that was all it would ever be.
“Really, she’s not,” he insisted.
“So, you’ve never slept with her?” I asked but immediately regretted asking, both because I didn’t want to imagine it and because the guilt in his eyes was my answer. The worst part was that it shouldn’t matter. He thought I was dead. It had been years. I’d been with other people. It was that stupid fairy tale again.
Wrapping my arms around my middle in defense, I tried to look anywhere but at his haunting blue eyes. “Never mind. That’s not my business. Anyway, what did you want to talk about?”
He sighed. “Well, that was a big part of what I wanted to talk about. I know you saw Cookie out there with me, but it wasn’t what you thought. I mean, she and I—Fuck, I’m making this worse.” He ran a frustrated hand through his dark blond hair, and I wanted to touch it. He’d never had long hair when we were young. Not in a million years would I have thought I’d like it on him—but damn.
“Really, Lucian, you don’t owe me an explanation.”
“They call me Ghost,” he said as he moved closer to me again, and I backed up.
“Ghost? Why?” I asked as I cocked my head, trying to figure out what kind of nickname “Ghost” was for a guy.
He shrugged, suddenly looking uncomfortable. “I, just, um, no one calls me Lucian anymore.”
“Okay, so you don’t want me to call you Lucian. Check,” I said with a definitive nod and pressed my lips flat.
“Goddamn it, that’s not what I meant. I—” He stabbed his fingers in his hair and pulled. “Why can’t I talk to you without fucking up everything I want to say? We used to be best friends; we were lovers; you were my person. Now, everything is….”
“Fucked?” I offered unhelpfully, and he laughed humorlessly.
“Yeah. That pretty much sums it up. I don’t know where we go from here,” he said with slumped shoulders.
Pain lanced through my chest, and I smiled sadly. “I think our day in the sun has come and gone. Us together is a dangerous recipe for disaster, Lu—Ghost.”
“Bullshit.” He frowned and stomped toward me. Stubbornly, I held my ground that time. He pointed a finger at my chest, and I tipped my chin up defiantly. “You don’t get to make that decision on your own.”
“I can make any fucking decision I want. It may be a fucked-up existence, but it’s my motherfucking life, Ghost. So I get to decide what I do.” My lip curled as I snarled at him in anger that he dared tell me what I could or couldn’t do.
What I wasn’t expecting was his hand to shoot out, grab my hair, and twist slightly as he gripped it in his fist. The motion caused my head to tip back sharply as I stared up at his beautiful flashing eyes. He was only a little over six foot, but to my small frame, he was perfectly massive. The angle made it difficult to swallow, but I stubbornly clenched my jaw, afraid he’d see how he truly affected me.
His nostrils flared as he spoke through clenched teeth. “Well, right now someone is trying to kill you—again—and I’m pretty sure I saved your sexy little ass. I think that gives me a little credit.”
Biting my tongue, I worked my jaw but didn’t reply. The second he called me sexy, I damn near wept. Hell, between my legs, I did. Regardless of all the shit water that had washed under our bridges, my body still craved him as much as it always did. No amount of time or distance was going to change that.
“God, I want to—” He closed his eyes as if he was struggling not to complete the sentence.