It would likely be some time before I heard back, so I’d reached for the screen to close my laptop when I heard a ping. Insanely, I was debating going to the party Lucian had invited me to attend. That sound quickly had me focused on my screen instead.
Juggernaut: With?
Me: Someone found out some of my history. How do I find out who it is?
Juggernaut: Seriously?
Me: Yes
Juggernaut: If they are good, you can’t.
Me: Shit
Juggernaut: You’re not a hacker like that, Scarlett. There’s no way for me to explain how to even try. Do you want me to look into it?
I hesitated. There was no way I was giving him any more than he already had. Unless he already knew everything about me but was polite enough not to say so—or he could always be a psycho. Which was a little scary and made me question my sanity in talking to him at all.
Me: No.
Juggernaut: Let me know if you change your mind.
I wouldn’t.
After closing out the connection with Juggernaut, I stared at Lucian’s mug shot. I compared it to the changes I’d noticed in the grocery store. Young Lucian had been beautiful and bright—a brilliant football player with incredible potential. Thirty-one-year-old Lucian was devastatingly gorgeous. Shoulder-length dirty-blond hair, stunning blue eyes framed with lines that spoke of laughter and time in the sun. It had almost hurt to look at him.
And that body. Holy shit.
He’d grown a good two inches and filled out like a wet dream. All the years I’d forced myself not to look him up had nearly killed me. I’d told myself it wouldn’t be fair, and it would devastate me to find out he was happily married with kids and a perfect life. I couldn’t contact him because I didn’t want to put him in danger, and I wasn’t sure if he’d want to see me again anyway.
Before I could get up and drive to the address I’d already committed to memory, I filled my glass again. The bottle was empty, and I got up to grab the last one. After I’d run into Lucian, I’d grabbed three bottles because I knew I’d need them. I only stumbled a little bit on my way over to the fridge.
“How the hell would I explain why I hadn’t contacted you all this time?” I asked the image of Lucian on my screen. He would hate me.
Sure, he asked me to go to the party, but did that prove he wasn’t in a relationship? Maybe he was married. Those biker types weren’t all loyal to their women. At least from what little I’d seen over the years. They all had those skanky women at their clubhouses. I’d done some bartending for a club in California once. Something-or-other Scorpions. Assholes.
It made me uneasy that Lucian was part of that life. It also turned my stomach a little. Not that I would ever be able to actually be with him again.
Suddenly, it was killing me to know if he was married. Chewing on my piercing, I searched public records. I blamed the wine for my weakness.
Nothing regarding a marriage.
Didn’t mean he didn’t have a live-in or a girlfriend. His address for his driver’s license was the clubhouse. He had $257 in his checking account and $3,741 and some change in his savings account. If I knew if he’d gone to college, I could see what his grades were. That was as far as my “hacker” skills really went. I wished I’d picked Juggernaut’s brain more.
I froze.
Did I dare?
I’d owe him, and that scared me a bit. My fingers fluttered nervously over the keys without typing anything. Finally, I grabbed myself by the lady-balls because I needed to know anything he could find for me. Something to hold close.
Me: Changed my mind. I need a favor
I waited.
Then waited some more. Dammit, he’d just been there. I sighed.
Juggernaut: I like the sound of this.
Me: Ugh.