I’d never admit it to a living soul, but I was fucking terrified. It was getting dark, and it would be my third night sleeping out on the street. Glancing around, it seemed like there was movement in every shadow. Sounds seemed amplified. My senses were on overload, and paranoia was tight on my heels.
Not close to being tired, I decided to walk downtown for a bit. More people, less shadows.
After adjusting my backpack, I pulled my beanie down over my eyebrows, then darted across the street and down a few blocks. Weaving in and out of the growing throngs, I shoved my hands in the pockets of my jeans.
As the sun set, the temperatures began to drop. My hoodie wouldn’t ward off the late fall chill well by the time full night hit. I’d pull out my jacket later.
Pretending to belong, I leaned my shoulder against the brick of an old building. Hands shaking, I dug in the side pocket of my bag and pulled out a smashed pack of cigarettes. Extracting one, I lit it and took a satisfying drag before blowing the smoke into the air. Then I shoved the pack back in and zipped the pocket shut.
A few people gave me dirty looks, because smoking wasn’t really cool anymore, but most ignored me. Kind of the story of my life.
“You got another one of those?”
I glanced over and into the hazel eyes of a girl who didn’t look old enough to be out by herself, let alone asking to bum a cigarette. Taking another drag, I stared at her but didn’t reply.
“Well, fuck you very much too,” she grouched. Then she simply stared at me. “You’re new.”
“What the hell are you talking about?” I asked, unable to resist after her cryptic remark.
“You think I don’t know everyone who hangs out down here? Besides, no one our age is down here at this time, carrying a bag that looks stuffed with all your worldly possessions, and looking lost—unless they are. Welcome to Never Never Land, Lost Boy.” She smirked, and the way she seemed to look through my entire existence was unnerving.
“Yeah, I’m just passing through.” I tried to sound cool, hoping to blow her off.
She snorted. “Okay. I’ll play along. Where you headed, tall, dark, and handsome?”
I shrugged. “California.”
In truth, I had no idea where I was going. I’d been cut loose from foster care when I aged out of the system a week ago. I’d spent too much of the money I had on a bus ticket to Des Moines and a hotel room for the first four nights. Realizing how dumb that was, I’d packed up my bag and hit the street.
She laughed, and my hackles rose a little at her attitude. “California, huh? How you gonna get there? Fly in your private jet? I got news for you—dreams are for the foolish. The only way you’re gonna survive out here is if you toughen up and learn the only one who’s gonna look out for you is you. If you make a few close friends, you’ll have someone to watch your back. But don’t trust too easily. That’ll get you burned too.”
As I studied her, I sucked deep on the cigarette. Then as I blew the smoke out, I held it out in a… a peace offering of sorts?
She gave me a half-grin and reached for it. When our fingers touched, I was slammed with visions that had me gasping for breath and stumbling backward.
“You okay?” She appeared concerned, but she took a drag, then held her hand out to give it back.
“You keep it,” I choked out, trying to make the visions of her being repeatedly raped by an older man get out of my head. “I think I just quit.”
Her melodic laughter rang out. “Thanks. I’ll see you around, Lost Boy.”
It took a minute to fully get my breath back as I watched her walk off smoking the rest of my cigarette. Despite the cool temperatures, she had on a short denim skirt, a pair of combat boots, and a lightweight denim jacket. Her curly dark hair was blowing around her face as she smiled up at a small group of what I guessed were college-aged guys.
They chatted for a bit, one of them slipped a hand in her jacket, and she stepped back. Then I saw her shake her head and say something. He smirked, reached in his pocket, and handed her some money. It shouldn’t have surprised me when she sauntered off around the corner of the building with him as his friends yelled out taunts, but it did.
It didn’t take long before he came strutting back out tucking his shirt in. His friends laughed with him, and they all walked off and into one of the small bars. She still hadn’t come out.
Right when I was getting ready to go check on her, she came around the corner wiping under her eyes. She looked up and saw me still standing there. A huge smile that was fake as fuck spread across her face as she approached me.
“You eaten yet?”
Like an idiot, I stood there and blinked at her.
“Earth to Lost Boy,” she said as she waved a hand in front of my face. “You in there? Are you some kind of special kid, or what? I asked you a question.”
“Um, no,” I finally replied, realizing I was starving as my stomach rumbled.
“Well, come on. I know this little twenty-four-hour diner a couple blocks away that serves a cheap but good breakfast all day. My treat.”