“Um. Yeah, listen. I need to apologize. I should have told you about Candace. It was a huge error in judgment on my part. We were just enjoying ourselves so much and I didn’t want to ruin it with such a bomb like that.”
“Why would you think that it would ruin anything?”
“Well, at Beverly’s you had said kids weren’t really your thing, so I just wasn’t sure how you’d take it.”
“I see.”
“But that was a terrible assumption. I’m sorry.”
“Thanks,” was all I could say. I could see why my declaration at Beverly’s had freaked him out, but he didn’t even give me the chance to explain before assuming I had sworn off all children.
“In the spirit of being honest, I should tell you one more thing.” He paused for a moment. “Um, Candace has a brother.”
“Oh.” My eyes widened.
“Yeah, he’s ten. He’s at a sleepaway camp this summer.”
“Okay, then. And they are both your ex-wife’s?”
“Yes, I had them with Amber. Candace wasn’t supposed to show up until next week. I have shared custody, so I get her for half of the summer, but she came early.”
“Why?” I asked. “I mean, if you don’t mind me asking.”
“Amber has a pretty…hands-off parenting style.”
“That’s putting it lightly,” a voice from behind us said.
“Candace. Nice of you to join us,” Brenton said.
I watched as Candace shed her shirt and her pants, revealing a tiny purple two-piece. Without another word, she hopped into the pool. Brenton groaned beside me.
“Candace, dinner is almost ready! Swimming can wait till after.”
Candace ignored him, continuing to swim laps.
“I’m sorry,” Brenton turned back to me.
“Don’t worry about it. I remember what it was like being a teenager. I was the same way.”
“So, do you forgive me? For not telling you?”
“Let’s just see how this evening goes,” I told him.
“Deal. Come inside with me for a moment?”
“Sure.” I followed Brenton into the kitchen, where he pulled a pasta salad and some watermelon out of the fridge.
“Candace doesn’t know this yet, but I’m trying to get full custody of her and Aiden. Candace was right out there. I was putting Amber’s parenting lightly. She’s practically the devil. The reason I’ve been so touch and go with you is because I can’t let anything jeopardize my custody battle. My kids have been through so much already.”
I was speechless. It made plenty of sense now. Why Brenton avoided me this past week, why he was so angry about those photos I took, why he pulled back when I told him I didn’t want kids.
“I didn’t tell you everything at Beverly’s.” Brenton’s honestly made me want to return the favor.
“I had told you kids weren’t really my thing, but that isn’t because of my lack of trying. I had tried to get pregnant with Carter, and it worked. But then I miscarried. The doctor said it was normal and there was nothing I could have done, but I was devastated. I spent months really depressed, feeling like I had failed our relationship somehow. I know now that wasn’t true. It wasn’t my fault, but at the time I couldn’t get past it. Focusing on my work was the only thing that pulled me through. I did want to have kids. I still do, but I decided I couldn't risk going through that again – it was too painful.”
“Helen, I’m so sorry. If I had known—”
“I didn’t want you to. I guess I also didn’t want to ruin the direction things were going by dropping a bomb on you either.”
“Well I appreciate you telling me.”
“Likewise.”
I helped Brenton carry the food to the patio and he pulled the burgers off the grill. Candace finally got out of the pool, plopping into a chair across from me with a squish, still dripping wet.
“So, Helen. Where are my boots?”