“Emma…” My mother trails off. “I can’t tell you what to do. You’re a big girl. You’re twenty-one, and it’s time for you to start making your own choices.”
I purse my lips and look at her in confusion.
Mom takes a deep breath. “But Jason – I mean, your father – well, he’s never wanted what’s best for you. He’s a self-centered bastard and I have a feeling that he always will be. I want you to think about what you want to do. Your father and I will be fine.”
All I can do is stare at her. “Are you serious?” I gnaw on my lower lip until the bitter metallic taste of blood splashes across my tongue. “Are you really saying that I should betray Dad?”
My mother shakes her head. “No,” she replies. “But I want you to be happy, Emma. After being married to your father for over twenty years, I know that he doesn’t care about hurting those closest to him. He’s never thought twice about my feelings. Or yours, for that matter.”
My head is filled with a raging sea of emotions as my mother speaks. For the first time, I wonder just how much abuse Ramona’s gone through at the hands of my father. I always thought she was weak for not standing up to him, but maybe it was simply that she had lost her will to fight.
“I’ll let you think about what you want to do, sweetie,” Mom says softly. She stands up and walks over to the bed before leaning down and kissing my forehead like she used to do when I was a kid. “Just know that I love you.”
Between Dane’s harsh words and my mother’s kindness, my heart is starting to feel like I put it through a juicer.
“I love you, too,” I say quietly. Impulsively, I get to my feet and throw my arms around my mother. She hugs me tightly and then pulls away.
“Your father isn’t home,” Mom says from the doorway of my room. “But I would think about what you want, and soon.”
I nod. “Okay. And thank you.”
Mom nods one more time and closes the door behind her. As soon as she’s gone, I flop down on my bed. My head is spinning and I feel faint. When my head hits the pillow, I close my eyes and immediately Dane’s face floats to the front of my mind.
I think back to the vow I made when I got home. About how I’m not going to let anyone tell me what to do anymore. My mom even said that I have to make my own choices.
I could go with Dane. Dane, the man who loves me and cares for me just as I am. The man who has never asked anything of me.
Or I could keep trying to make my father happy. I could go to Trim Acres and give up pizza and sugar and everything else good in the world. But based on everything my mom just told me, I still don’t think that would make him love me.
I can’t stay here. I have to follow the man I love, Dane, and forget all about my father because Dane is my future.
And as for Jason?
He never loved me. He never cared. In fact, he was willing to banish me to a fat farm, so that I wouldn’t embarrass him.
So Jason is nothing. Less than nothing. And if I want one last shot at happiness, I have to return to Dane and make him understand that we belong together.
16
Dane
Even when I lived among other men, I was never much of a drinker. The occasional liquid lunch or dinner was required to impress Xander Corp clients, but I never wanted to dive face-first into a bottle like Jason did.
But I’m starting to feel differently. I’m so filled with loathing and self-hatred that I can’t stand to be alone with myself. I need to do something to drown out the thoughts of sweet, perfect Emma. She’s haunting me.
Crossing the floor of my cabin, I reach into the cupboard and pull out a bottle of whiskey. It’s covered with dust and I brush off the glass before untwisting the cap and taking a long swig. The amber liquid burns all the way down to my stomach, but it feels good.
I need to punish myself.
“Emma,” I growl under my breath. Wiping the whiskey droplets from my beard, I take another huge swig. This time I start to cough and sputter as the alcohol flows down my throat.
A sound makes me stop dead in my tracks. It’s a soft rapping, almost like a twig brushing against the side of the cabin.
No.
It can’t be her.
I must have imagined it. There’s no way Emma is here, standing outside my front door, waiting for me.
Closing my eyes, I shake my head and force down another huge gulp of whiskey.