“Get what?”
“Get how you seem so—I don’t know. Looking to the future when our present is a pile of shit.”
He scrubbed his hand across his jaw, suddenly looking more exhausted than he’d been letting on. He hadn’t slept. He’d driven us from Waco to Odessa, and while I’d cat-napped in the motel room, he’d gone to see his colleague. How was he even still awake?
“It’s always a pile of shit. Life, I mean,” he said. “Sure, there are times of calm. But the thing is, it’s always a mess to clean up. One fire after the next. Do you think it would be any different if you were just a normal civilian with no idea about the MC feud and a cartel in our city? No, it wouldn’t be any different, you just wouldn’t know about it. It wouldn’t be in your face.”
“I stopped being a regular civilian the moment I met Dev.”
Colt nodded. “On his radar.”
I sighed.
“You’re not regretting sticking around are you?” he asked. Naked vulnerability was etched across his face.
I went to him and pressed my head to his chest. “No regrets,” I admitted. “But what would you do if I told you I did have them?”
He cupped the back of my neck and gave it a light squeeze, silently demanding that I look at him. “I’d let you go. I’d get you somewhere safe with a new identity.”
“You’d let me go? Really?”
He chuckled. “You sound disappointed.”
“I thought you’d be all possessive and demanding and tell me under no circumstances you’d let me go.”
“Love is about doing what’s best for the other person, yeah?”
“Yeah.” I stood on my tiptoes and brushed my lips against his. “I don’t want to go. I want to stand next to you when we come out on the other side of this.”
“You will. I know you will.”
He turned away, giving me a perfect view of his muscular, inked back and his tight ass before slipping into the bathroom.
Jesus. Where had he come from?
And how did I get so lucky to call him mine?
An hour later, we met the boys at the diner down the road. They were sitting across from one another, drinking sodas and Boxer was eating a plate of chili cheese fries while Zip went for a more traditional breakfast of a short stack with fried eggs.
Boxer looked up at Colt and grinned. “You’re in a good mood.”
“Yeah,” Colt said lightly. “Don’t ruin it.”
Boxer shoved his plate across the table next to Zip and then got up so Colt and I could sit together on the same side of the booth. After the perky young waitress took our order and left, I asked, “So, when do we find out what we find out?”
“Few days,” Colt replied vaguely.
The boys exchanged a look and then Zip altered the direction of the conversation when he said, “Gotta call from Knight. They’re on their way.”
Colt nodded. “I hate calling them in for back up.”
Boxer shrugged. “They’ve called us before for back up. It’s why we have brothers.”
“Who’s Knight?” I asked.
“Knight is president of the Blue Angels in Coeur d’Alene.”
The waitress brought our food and check. With bedroom eyes sent in Boxer’s direction, she told us to have a nice day. Boxer watched her depart. “If y’all will excuse me, I need to see the waitress about something.” He scooted out of the booth and went in search of the woman about to be on the receiving end of Boxer’s charm.