He’d been thinking about me. Was I mentally screwed up because hearing him say that made it better? I hated he had been with other girls but just knowing it was hard on him and he’d thought of me eased the pain some. I’d started this. My stupid need to please Josh’s mom. He’d have never done it had I not brushed him off. All of this heartache just because Josh’s mother had made me feel guilty.
“I was confused,” I admitted.
Cage let out a hard laugh. “Yeah, well I wasn’t.”
I took a step toward him and he shook his head. “Don’t come closer.”
“Please, listen to me. Let me explain.”
He ran a hand through his dark hair and I could see the internal battle in his expression. I needed to talk while I had him weak.
“I made a mistake. I listened to someone else who knew nothing about you. I let my fears get the best of me and I made a very, very bad mistake.”
Cage dropped his hand back to his lap and his sad eyes met mine. “But you listened. Something Josh’s mother said made sense to you. As much as I hate to admit it she was probably right. You were right to back away.”
He’d already figured out who had talked to me and he called her Josh’s mom, not Jeremy’s. He was making this about Josh.
“No, Cage. No, I wasn’t.”
“Yeah, Eva, you were. I’m not the good guy. I’m not the guy you could ever tell your daddy about. You would be embarrassed to let people in this small town know you’d gone from the great and mighty Josh Beasley to the loser Cage York. You deserve a Josh Beasley.”
My heart broke as I watched the self -loathing on Cage’s face. I hated myself for putting it there. He wasn’t Josh. He was nothing like Josh. He was more.
“Cage, please don’t,” I begged, closing the distance between us.
He backed away and I grabbed his face with my hands and covered his lips with mine. He didn’t respond at first. When I straddled his lap and crawled on top of him he caved. His hands slid up the backs of my legs as he slipped his tongue in my mouth and began kissing me back.
The groan that tore from his chest made me a little crazy. I wanted this so badly. I needed to feel close to him again. I reached for the bottom of my shirt and pulled it off ignoring Cage’s protest. I grabbed his face again, pressing my bare chest against his. The cold barbell tickled my nipple and I shivered.
I tasted him the way he always tasted me. Kissing each corner of his mouth, I nipped at his bottom lip and pulled his tongue into my mouth sucking it hard. When his hands cupped my br**sts I cried out and pressed down on him. His erection put pressure on my swollen heat. Tonight that wasn’t enough. I needed to be closer. I’d almost lost him. I needed more.
I pushed him until he fell back on the mattress underneath me. Seeing him staring up at me with those eyes that reflected what I was feeling sent any doubt from my mind. I stood up and started taking off my shorts.
“Eva, don’t… ah f**k,” Cage groaned as I stepped out of my panties and crawled back on top of him. I pulled the covers down so I could take his boxers off and his erection sprang free instead. Cage slept naked. Reaching down I took him in my hands and slid my hands down his silky warm texture.
Cage let out a low moan, “Ahhhh, Eva you don’t want to do this,” he said in a hoarse desperate plea.
Yes, I did. I wanted to do this more than I wanted to breathe.
I slid my hands up his chest and lowered my body over his. Keeping my legs on each side of his hips I closed my eyes in pure pleasure as his erection jerked against my wet opening.
I’d never done this but I’d read enough to know it would be difficult to do this my first time with me on top. I needed him to take over. I slid over him several times causing him to curse and grab the sheet under him in a death grip.
“Cage, I want you inside me. I want you to make love to me,” I whispered against his ear and he trembled underneath me. It was a powerful feeling and I loved it.
Cage moaned and grabbed my waist. He pulled my chest closer to his mouth. When my nipple dangled in front of him he reached up and covered it with his mouth. Crying out I pressed his head closer to me. I wanted more.
He bit down gently on my nipple and my body felt a zing shoot through it.
“Yes, please,” I begged. He let it pop out of his mouth before moving to the next breast and doing the same thing to it. I began rocking back and forth. The more he sucked the better it got.
Cage shifted his hips and I froze when the head of his erection entered me. Closing my eyes I wanted to warn him but it felt so good I couldn’t find words.
“Fuck baby, you’re so damn tight,” he groaned as his hands grabbed my hips and held me still. I pressed down and the pain from the stretching was exciting.
“Stop. Don’t. I ‘ll hurt you. Please. Just give me a minute. I need to do this easy,” his breathing was labored and his words choppy.
I let him ease me down lower and I cried out as the pain intensified. He stilled.
“Eva?” he asked in a pained voice. Was I hurting him too? Was I too tight?
“Yeah?” God, please don’t let him stop.
“You’re a virgin.”
I swallowed nervously, “Yeah.”
“Oh, hell,” he groaned and began sliding back out of me.
“No, don’t please,” I begged as he lifted me off him.
He flipped me on my back and he stared down at me. “I want this. So help me God, I don’t deserve this but I want it so f**king bad. Are. You. Sure?” His face was so torn. I reached up and cupped his face rubbing my thumb across his cheekbone.