I thought she would tell me that I tricked her. That I’m not the man she thought I was.
That she thought that I was her hero and then I turned out to be the opposite of one. But those kinds of accusations don’t seem to be simmering in her mind. She still looks at me, like she’s addicted to my gaze, her chest rising and falling in deep breaths and she has goosebumps on her arms.
They spike, looking like frost on her warm skin.
When I stroke them with my knuckles, she leans into my touch as always. A trapped, little creature who doesn’t seek to be let out of her trap. She knows she’s safe there. She knows the hunter who she belongs to.
And most importantly she knows that I didn’t do what I did out of malice. I did it because I had no choice, because she awoke something in me that I thought was too offensive, too undesirable, too detrimental to ever be let up to the surface.
With Amber I had no choice, she pushed those buttons easily. Carelessly. Her fingers moving over them instinctually, playing with me even when she had no idea who she was playing with.
She didn’t know just how deep my love for her goes. Now she does. And she’s still here.
Fully bare right in front of someone like me, as if she underneath all that softness has got some steel. People say nothing in this world is perfect but they’re wrong. I’ve found the one thing that is and it’s her.
And I’m going to have her and keep her no matter how selfish that might make me. When I cross my arms, her gaze goes to my pectorals and her expression turns sultry. She responds to me. Always. And I shamelessly use it against her for my own benefit.
She loves it when I’m buried in her, griping my name over and over last night. All of that is going to serve me, because the more she responds to me, the better. I want her as hooked on me as I am on her.
“You think you know what you’re doing?” I say in a low voice and her eyes dart, her lips pulling to the side in a half-smile. It’s coquettish and girly and made for solely me.
I’ve always hated seeing her smile at someone else. Not just out of my usual jealousy but because I treasure each one, never taking them for granted.
“No, but I know what I want.” Her own tone is steady, but there’s a slight trembling in the background. I don’t let it get to me. It’s only natural that she’s still a little adverse. The pulse on the hollow of her throat jitters and I grind my jaw.
“Are you sure?” I rasp. “There can be no going back.”
There’s only a certain amount of chances that I can give her. Every time I give her an opportunity to express her doubts, it feels like I’m being burned alive. I’ve known men who don’t even blink when their women threaten to leave them.
If Amber did that to me, it would be a threat to my whole existence. There is nothing worse I can think of than be forced to roam this world without her.
Amber jerks her chin. “So you’ve said. But I’m not afraid of this.” Her eyes flicker with determination. “Or you for that matter.”
Many people have been. Many people still are, but not her. Because she’s always going to get the best of me. All my devotion. All my worship.
My chest aches from her bravery. “That so?”
She nods firmly as if she’s ready to accept any challenge. “Yes.”
“You know what it means to give yourself to me fully?” I say, my voice slow because I know that this is going to be difficult. “It’s not to be taken lightly. You know what it means to be all mine?”
“Y...yes.” Slight hesitation crosses her face. “That I belong to you.”
A muscle ticks in my jaw. “Means I won’t be able to share you.”
She flinches. “I understand...”
“With anyone,” I say with hard possession in my voice. At first it looks like she doesn’t get it and she rubs her arms with her hands as if suddenly cold, before it dawns on her.
“Oh...” Amber gasps, putting a hand over her mouth and her brows curve over her eyes before she slowly drops her hand. “You don’t want any kids.”
My throat strangles at her disappointment and from looking at her youthful, fertile body being so ready. So perfect...it cuts me. But it cuts me more having to share her.
“I can’t do it,” I say, the thought alone making me break out into cold sweat. “Do you understand?”
She bites her lip, looking at me hopefully. “M...maybe...?”
“No maybes,” I interrupt, my muscles straining and she winces and I know I have that look in my eyes. But then she straightens, throwing her hair over her shoulder and she nods.