Prologue
Cole
“Cole?” I see her lips move, but I don’t hear her voice. Everything is just a blur, a haze fueled by hate.
“What are you doing out here? What’s wrong?” This time, her soft voice breaks through the blood whooshing past my ears.
I stare into her concerned emerald eyes before they drop to take in the state of me. I have no clue how I look right now, but after what happened over the past couple of hours, I’ve got a very good idea.
“Hadley?” My voice is deep and rough. It doesn’t sound like my own. I blink at her, trying to focus on where exactly I am and why she’s here.
This is my nightmare. Why is she in it?
Every muscle in my body pulls tight as the images of what I did only minutes ago flick through my mind like a movie.
“Cole, you’re scaring me.”
“Fuck,” I breathe, dragging my hand down my face and rubbing at my jaw.
It’s not until she gasps in horror that I realize my mistake.
It was easy to imagine that I wasn’t sporting the evidence from what I did. Easy to push it all aside like I do with everything that’s a part of my past.
But she’s staring right at the truth.
A truth I can’t taint her with.
She’s too innocent. Too pure.
“Cole...” Her voice trembles as her brows draw together in confusion. “What the hell did you do?”
Those images flick through my mind once more as if I’m back there and doing it all over again.
“Nothing. You need to leave.”
“I’m not leaving you here like that.”
“Hadley,” I warn, ensuring my voice is cold and menacing in a way that usually makes people run as fast as they can. Only, Hadley Rexford isn’t most people.
“Cole,” she warns back, placing her hands on her hips and taking a step toward me.
“You shouldn’t be here. You shouldn’t have seen me.”
“Yet, I am here, and I have seen you. So what are you going to do about it?” she sasses.
“I… uh…” My head spins. I can barely think to form words let alone know what I should be doing right now. Hiding in the bushes was as far as I got.
I need to go home. I need to get rid of these clothes and pretend nothing unusual happened tonight. I need to be in my bed so no one questions me when the truth comes out.
“Let’s go,” she states, wrapping her hand around my upper arm and attempting to drag me with her.
“What the fuck are you doing?”
“Taking you to get cleaned up.” She looks me up and down once more. “You can hardly go home covered in…” Hadley gulps. “Looking like that.”
“Where?”
“My dorm. No one will see us.”
Unable to do anything else, I allow her hand to slip into mine and fall into step beside her.
No words are said on the walk back to campus. I’m grateful; I don’t have anything to say. I just need darkness… nothingness. It’s the only place where I can find solace.
As we approach the dorm building, I expect her to walk straight through the main entrance like normal, but at the last minute she darts into the trees. I follow without question as we weave through the trunks before emerging at the back of the building.
She glances at me before we step out from the shadows. She must be able to see the question on my face because she smiles softly and answers it for me.
“The camera doesn't work back here. How do you think we all sneak in and out?”
I shrug, because I can’t say I’d ever thought about how any of the kids who live here sneak out. How the other half live has never really been a high priority of mine. Surviving this bullshit life has been top of my list.
With her fingers still laced through mine, she leads me to the back door and up a few flights of stairs I vaguely recognize from my previous visit.
“This is me,” she whispers, coming to a stop at her door.
She reaches into her purse to get her key as I look around, ensuring that we’re not being watched. There are plenty of kids at this school who would love to get hold of some dirt on me or my brothers.
Thankfully, no one else is in the hallway, so as far as I know we’re not spotted. But that doesn’t stop me darting into her room as fast as I can once she’s opened the door.
I look around at all her girly shit and smirk. I don’t know all that much about Hadley, but I’m as shocked as I was the first time I was here as I take in all her pink and glittery shit.
Her bed is littered with fluffy and sparkly pink cushions, and her shelves are covered in photo frames holding images of her and Remi, my brother’s girlfriend, over the past few years, along with other useless crap.
“Not your style?” she asks me once I’ve finished scoping out the place and turn back to her.
I shrug. I don’t need to tell her that I’m not a hearts and flowers kind of guy. I’m standing here covered in someone else’s blood, for fuck’s sake.
“A-are you okay? Are you hurt?” she asks hesitantly, looking over me.
It’s the first time I’ve even thought about myself as I consider my answer. I’m not in any physical pain—that motherfucker didn’t have a chance. But I’m pretty sure a part of me should be hurting right now. Well, I guess it would be if I had a heart like any normal person.
For the first time tonight, I glance down at myself. My hoodie might be dark, but there’s no mistaking the blood that’s covering it. I lift both my hands, holding them up in front of my face. The electric light makes the red staining them even more obvious.
I stare at them in a daze as I think about the person it belongs to.
Worthless piece of shit.
“Cole?” she prompts when I don’t offer her an answer. “Are you hurt?” she tries again, only slower this time, as if she’s talking to an idiot.
“No. This doesn’t belong to me.”
Her shoulders visibly relax for a beat, but it doesn't last long as she registers my words.