A chill goes through me. “Did D put you up to this?”
“What?” His brows furrow.
“This. Coming up here to check on me? Offering me a ride home? I don’t need your pity, Ry.”
“Whoa.” He holds up his hands. “That’s not what this is, okay? I just thought—”
“Forget it. I should go.” I stand. “Thanks for the beer though.”
“Kat, come on. You don’t need to run off. I’m not—”
But I’m already gone, taking the emergency stairwell around the back of the building to avoid any unwanted attention.
Maybe I should have taken Ryder up on his offer. It is getting late and after everything that’s happened lately, I probably should be more careful.
But I’ve never needed anyone to look out for me before.
I’m not about to start now.
2
STYX
“Motherfucker,” I grunt, throwing my cell down on the couch cushion beside me as I fall back.
Just like every other message I’ve sent since the day I told her that, despite my promises, I was going to talk to her brother and find a way for us to be together, it wasn’t going to happen.
Fuck I wanted it. Craved it more than I ever had before since having a taste of her.
But I also know that I was doing the right thing.
Having Diesel back, giving him the chance to trust me again, and ultimately keeping a close eye on Kat while their lives spiral out of control had to be the right thing to do.
Right?
I figure that I’ve waited all this time. A few more weeks, months will be bearable…
Right?
I stare up at the ceiling, my eyes aching with exhaustion.
I’ve worked the late shift at the bar for the last twelve days in a row and I’m fucking dead on my feet.
But that doesn’t mean I can shut off. I can’t. Not while I’m worrying about her.
Listening to D talk about how their mother’s health is declining cracked something inside me. It was the proof I really didn’t need to hear about how hard both of their lives are right now. It was also a reality check.
Kat’s been partying too much especially with the number of times I’ve had to deliver her home completely wasted. It makes so much sense, and it makes me question everything.
Does she even really want me? Or am I just this forbidden bit of fun she’s able to focus on in order to forget about all the shit in her life.
Am I just an escape for her?
A distraction?
I wouldn’t blame her if I was. I can hardly argue that she doesn’t need one for all the shit she’s dealing with.
With a sigh, I let my head fall back and close my eyes.