“With big brother right over there, maybe next time, darlin’.” He gives me a playful wink that makes my stomach flutter.
It’s hard not to be affected by Ryder Montrou. He’s as gorgeous as they come. Tall, tatted, with dark eyes that penetrate your soul. But just like every other good looking guy around here, he’s in the MC. He grew up with my brother. Respects the hell out of him. Even if I offered myself up on a platter, he wouldn’t take it.
Because I’ll always be Diesel Walker’s little sister.
And sometimes I hate it.
“I’m going to head up to the roof,” I tell him, grabbing my soda. “If anyone asks where I am…”
I don’t finish the sentence because chances are, from the laughter filling the air, no one will ask.
“Kat?” Ryder calls after me as I make my way toward the back door, so I can slip out unnoticed.
“Yeah?”
Something flashes in his eyes, something dark and intense, but then it’s gone, replaced with one of his trademark smirks. “Everything will be okay, you know.”
The words are sweet but they leave a bitter taste in my mouth. Because it’s a lie.
A lie people tell each other when the truth is too hard to bear.
Mom isn’t going to get better.
Diesel has a new family now.
And me…
I have nobody but myself to count on.
* * *
The roof terrace above the Red Ridge Sinners clubhouse is one of my favorite places in the world. Peace in chaos. Or at least, that’s what it reminds me of.
In the bar and compound below, men fight and fuck and ride free and wild. But up here, the world stops. I’ve been curled up in one of the mismatched chairs for the best part of an hour, scrolling absentmindedly through my socials as I sip on the soda Ryder gave me, wishing it was something stronger.
But if Diesel—or one of his brothers—found me up here, drunk and disorderly, I’d be sent home with orders to stay there no doubt.
So alone I sit, trying to ignore the faint rumble of laughter from below. Trying to ignore the growing ache in my chest.
I shouldn’t resent River and my brother for what they’ve found with Zach and Jax but it’s a bitter pill to swallow. Watching them worship the ground she walks on. Falling headfirst for the quiet girl who didn’t know her place when she first arrived here.
It’s almost funny that she’s theirs now. Pulled so tightly into their world, when I’ve been here all along but feel more on the periphery than ever.
Getting up, I wander over to the edge of the roof and grip the rail. A gust of wind blasts across my face making my teeth chatter but I like it. There’s something freeing about being up here, even if I am alone.
Even if—
“Ahhh.” I shriek, stumbling back into whoever grabbed me.
“Shit, darlin’, I didn’t mean—”
“Ryder?” I pin him with a murderous look. “What the hell were you thinking? You almost gave me a heart attack.”
“I didn’t mean… shit, you good?” His dark gaze sweeps over my face, lingering.
The way he looks at me disarms me.
“I’m fine.” I brush past him, trying to get my racing heart under control.