As quietly as I can, I slip into the house. There’s no sign of Aunt Cassie’s infectious laughter but I’m hardly surprised. That woman is something else. Zach will probably have to drag her home from the clubhouse later.
“Mom?” I call out.
“In here, sweetheart.”
I kick off my boots and pad into the living room, smiling at the sight of Mom on the couch, wrapped in blankets.
But it also tugs on my heart to see her all alone like this. I’d offered to stay with her but in typical selfless Mom-style she insisted I go join everyone at the clubhouse.
“Hi, baby.” She gives me the biggest smile she can muster. “How was your night?”
“Fine. Can I get you anything?”
“No, I’m all good.”
“Is there room for me?” I ask, and she grins.
“Get in here.” Lifting up her blanket, she squishes back into the couch leaving a little space for me. Mom wraps me into her arms as I lie down beside her just like when I was a kid.
“I love you, Mom,” I whisper, trying to disguise the slight tremble in my voice.
“And I love you too, my sweet, sweet Katrina.” She kisses my head and tucks me closer.
I want her to tell me that she’ll be okay, that we’ll all get through this but she doesn’t.
Because she can’t.
Because there is no magic cure for MS, and we all know her symptoms are worsening. Some days her spasms and pain are so bad she can barely leave her bed. It breaks me to see her like that, to not be able to help her. And the truth is, I’m terrified.
I’m terrified of the day when it all becomes too much.
Diesel has River. He has Zach and Jax and his brothers at the club. But me? I don’t have anyone.
“Baby, you’re shaking,” Mom whispers and I squeeze my eyes shut, willing myself to calm down.
“Just cold, Mom,” I lie.
“You know, sweetheart. Everything will be okay,” she lies right back.
I don’t answer.
I can’t.
Because some lies are just too big to accept.
* * *
“Kat?” A voice whispers, something soft brushing over my face.
“M-Mom?” I crack an eye open.
“No, sweetie, it’s me. Cassie.” Aunt Cassie stares down at me. “Thought you could use this.” She offers me a mug of coffee and I sit up, careful not to wake Mom.
We must have fallen asleep. Mom is still out cold and I’m grateful that she managed to have a peaceful night’s rest.
I’m not so grateful for the kink in my neck though.
“Thanks.” I accept the mug of coffee and carefully extract myself from the sofa, joining my aunt in the kitchen.