Lea sipped her drink, setting it down. “It’s very good, thank you.”
“See? I can cook.”
“I always knew you could.” Lea winked. “As you said, you just don’t like to do it.”
“It’s always better to have someone else cook for you. Makes me feel loved.”
Lea chuckled lightly. “My mother cooked every meal for my father until all the kids were out of the house. Then she looked at him and told him it was his turn.”
“That must have been a shock.”
Nodding, Lea agreed. “It was. He can make a mean sandwich and heat up an oven ready meal, but it took him about ten years to really figure out how to cook. Now they share the load, but I don’t blame her for being tired of it. Three meals a day for twenty-plus years? That’s a lot.”
“Nothing more than you have done being single.”
“True. But I have no one else to cook for me.”
Jewel winked, her gaze dancing over Lea’s relaxed demeanor. “Well, I just cooked for you.”
She’d meant it as a tease and as stating the obvious. But she also wanted Lea to catch the underlying meaning, what she was saying without actually speaking the words. She would gladly cook for Lea, she would gladly share that load with her—she wanted it, even. Jewel reached over and touched the top of Lea’s hand with her fingers, but Lea pulled away and shoved her hand into her lap. Confused, Jewel went back to her meal and focused on that.
It was odd, the dance they were doing. One moment they were comfortable and the next the tension was so palpable they both struggled to stay in the moment and live into that discomfort. Jewel decided she needed to push on it a bit more. Lea was a creature of comfort, that was why she used her control to stay as close to normal as she could, but Jewel was the exact opposite. She had no problem butting her way into what needed to be said.
“Will you come to the spring concert?” Jewel asked.
“I was planning on it. I always try to go to those, you know that.” Lea shoved a forkful of carrots between her lips.
Jewel was going to have to be the one to break this moment, this tension. As soon as they finished eating, she went into the kitchen and grabbed the brownies. She cut and served up to pieces, shoving a few candles into Lea’s. She lit them and brought them out, handing the plate over with a smile. She sang happy birthday while Lea waited patiently.
Her heart raced. This was the moment. This was when they were finally going to break down this last damn wall that had been put up. Whether it was before or after Indigo, Jewel had no idea. It was still there. Indigo had only been a window into what could be possible for them.
Lea leaned forward, her lips parting and pushing out as she blew the candles out. Her cheeks had a slight flush to them, and Jewel suspected it was from some embarrassment but also just flushed from the moment. Jewel leaned in, their knees touching under the table as she fumbled for Lea’s fingers and gripped her hand.
Lea turned toward her, all the attention in those blue eyes on Jewel. How she had been so lucky to fall for this gorgeously strong woman, Jewel had no idea. She had a feeling Lea felt the same on a romantic level but that she held back for some strange reason. They had flirted all day, and Jewel was ready to take that final step.
Before she could chicken out, Jewel leaned in and pressed their mouths together. Lea tasted salty with a hint a sweet, no doubt left over from their dinner. Lea gasped and jerked back, her eyes wide. Not quite the reaction Jewel had hoped for. Jewel canted her head to the side, eyeing Lea carefully. What was her friend thinking?
They had spent all week at Indigo pushing passed these barriers. Why were they suddenly back up? Jewel reached up and skimmed the backs of her knuckles against Lea’s cheek and down to her chin before dropping her hand to cover their grasped ones.
“What are you thinking?” Jewel asked.
Lea shook her head. “I’m not doing this.”
Every defense Jewel had went up. “What do you mean?”
“We can’t do this, J.”
“Why the hell not?”
“I can’t—” Lea’s voice broke.
Jewel’s heart pounded. What was she supposed to do with this? Lea was all into it at Indigo. They’d slept together, and Lea had been the one to initiate all of that. What was this now? The complete opposite—cold, painful. This hurt. Jewel’s eyes welled with tears as she fought to try and listen to Lea and not just the inner voice and pain in herself.
“What’s going on, Lea? You better start talking.” Jewel knew her tone was full of anger, but she couldn’t rein it in. She’d spent all day preparing for this meal, flirting with Lea, trying to convince herself this was the right step to make, and for what? She wasn’t getting any kind of answer, nothing to explain why this sudden change from a week ago.
Lea leaned in, gripping Jewel’s cheek so their eyes met. Lea looked to be in as much turmoil as Jewel herself. Softening slightly, Jewel waited for the reason, waited to understand why this couldn’t happen. She needed to know.
“We can’t do this.”