“I wish you wouldn’t talk like it’s inevitable that the baby will die. Thirty weeks is viable.” He squeezed her hand. He didn’t know much about babies, but he knew that.
“Because it doesn’t matter. My babies have never come out breathing. David will try, but it won’t matter. I was lucky this time. I got Christmas and Thanksgiving with my baby. I have never gotten both before.” She touched her stomach delicately.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I don’t want anyone to know. It’s my happiness and pain. I don’t need anyone looking at me in pity when it’s all over.”
“But if you tell people, they will understand what is going on. You realize that while you are dealing with this all alone, your family has been worried sick about you? You may be hiding the reason for the pain, but you’re not actually hiding the pain from them.” He knew he was lecturing her for no reason, but he couldn’t understand how she didn’t see it.
“I really tried. It’s just how I feel. This is the tenth one, Hue. Ten. And the outcome is always the same.”
“Are you going to do the plan?” David had mentioned a plan.
“Yes, and maybe it will work.” She looked out the window. Even the way she said the words told him she wasn’t convinced it would work at all. That nothing could change what was going to happen.
They were both silent for a few minutes as the scenery rushed by. They were in town now, and though Hue was still speeding, they were going far slower than they had been. It was Sunday, and the traffic was light, but Hue still illegally passed four cars.
“Can I ask what the plan is?” he asked, his eyes on the road.
“C-section. I have always gone naturally. Usually, I am too far gone to stop delivery. If David thinks he can, he will take the baby out,” she whispered, and he could tell by her words that it was extreme.
Before he could think too much about the plan, he pulled into the emergency entrance of the hospital. He knew he was blocking the bay doors as he stopped in front of a half dozen men and women already in surgical gear. Jumping out of the pickup, he came around the front as two people were helping her out of the cab. Shaking them off her, she did it herself. Only Amanda would do it herself.
“Amanda Nordskov, onto the bed,” a tall man who was covered in thin blue hospital gear said to her sternly.
“Okay.” Taking off her jacket as she climbed on the bed, she hunched over. A nurse lifted her shirt as another woman started poking her with needles in the back. The tall man handed her a small plastic cup of something and then started feeling around her stomach. All in the bitter cold, but she didn’t shiver or move at all.
Hue squatted down so that his face was even with hers. “Are you okay?”
“No,” she whispered. But he knew this was what she wanted despite her words. He leaned over and kissed her lips. They were cold. It was still fifteen below, and they were working on her outside, but he couldn’t stop himself. It was the only way he knew how to comfort her right then, unable to actually touch her in case he got in the way.
“David, are you really having us do this out here?” the woman carefully poking Amanda with a needle asked.
“Yes, I want the epidural in so it can start taking effect—no wasting time getting her to a room.” The tall man, who must be David, stated, “Just remember, Sabrina, the faster you are, the quicker you can get inside.”
Before the sentence was over, the woman stepped back, and Amanda drank whatever was in the cup, then handed it to the nurse before she rolled onto her back. The moment she was flat on her bed, they finally pushed her into the hospital. Taking her hand as they wheeled her down a hallway, Hue had to nearly run to keep up. At a door, the original group backed off as another group took over. They, too, were fully masked and gowned.
Before he could think, he was pulled away from her hand as a nurse started to help him get a gown on and forced him to wash his hands as she expertly placed a hat and a mask over his face. “Leave the mask on.”
When he was fully covered from head to toe, he was sent into the room they had pulled Amanda into. Dr. Bennett was already there and chatting with her, as if there was not a sheet between them. David didn’t even look up at him, just changed subjects. “Dad’s here. Go hold her hand. I was just telling Amanda that she knew better than not coming in before today.”
Hue took Amanda’s hand in his. Hers was bare, and his was gloved, but her grip was strong. As he kissed her forehead, he realized that he had a mask on and pulled it down so he could kiss her skin. Her eyes flew to his. “Put your mask on.” Pulling the mask back on, he kissed her cheek that was still red from the cold.
A woman sitting by the other side of Amanda’s head looked at him, but all he could see was her brown eyes since she was covered completely in person protective clothing, just like he was. She looked down at Amanda and said, “Four minutes.” It was only then that he realized it was the same woman from outside, Sabrina. How she had changed so fast, he didn’t know.
From behind the wall, David asked, “Do you miss working here? Miss the excitement?”
“Not today. Could use a little less excitement today.” She bit her lip hard as a tear rolled down her cheek.
“Five,” Sabrina called out from beside him. He didn’t know what her count was about.
“Amanda, Grace is here. You remember Grace? She took over your job when you left,” David said, but Hue could tell his attention wasn’t on the introduction.
“I know. I told you to hire her,” Amanda said with a gasp, and Sabrina adjusted something on the monitor by her side.
The door behind them opened and closed, but nobody actually looked at who came in. “Okay, Cruz is here. You know, Mike, right Amanda? He’s going to take over with you and Dr. Bennett, and I will go with the baby,” Grace explained. “There are no handoffs unless it’s an emergency.”
“Amanda, this is an emergency,” David said. Hue forgot that the curtain was the only thing between them and the doctor, and the doctor was close.