I snort, turning to face him, grimacing at the purple bruise that’s developing on his cheek. “Then why are you still hanging out with her?” It’s not like Clark to hang out with a girl unless he’s getting a piece of ass. Even then, he fucks them and goes on his merry way. Women are expendable to Clark and he only goes for the easiest ones.
He’s a hit it and quit it guy, and he’s so serious about it, that he’s vowed never to fall in love. I mean I’m a dick, but even I know someday I’ll fall in love. It’s inevitable.
“Honestly, she’s really fun to hang out with. She’s the first girl I actually enjoy having a conversation with. And one of the few people who can see through my bullshit. She doesn’t care about her makeup or her hair, and she’s honest, like almost so honest it hurts. I like her…but I don’t like her. I see her more as one of the bros, ya know?”
I let my eyes drift closed momentarily. I would know these things if I pulled my head out of my ass, if I tried. Fuck, my heart seems to tense up inside my chest. The idea of letting go of the pain she caused me. It feels like I’m letting down my mother, letting down my father, even though he doesn’t deserve an ounce of my pity, not anymore. Yeah, we bounced back from it, but we had to lose it all to get here.
“I don’t think I can let this go, Clark.” My admission feels like a weight is being lifted off my shoulders, but it’s only one weight…there are still hundreds more.
“I think you need to. Holding onto that kind of anger, it eats at you. It’s been five years, it’s time to let it go. Plus, you should talk to her about it. Ask her what happened that night. Her version of it all. Maybe there’s more to the story that you don’t know about.”
My face deadpans. He makes it sound like he knows something I don’t know but he doesn’t. Whatever Ava told him, it’s a lie. My parents told me what she did, and they wouldn’t lie to me…would they?
Chapter Eleven
Ava
Alan, a friend of Remington and Jules, hands me another shot and I down it just as fast as I did the last one. The liquor burns less this time, my body slowly numbing itself. Now I know why people drink their problems away, because the alcohol makes you forget. Which is all I want. To forget… to let go. This is what I need, to drink my troubles away with my friends like a normal college student. Forget Vance, my mother, and my seriously fucked up life.
“Are you okay?” Jules asks, placing a hand on my arm. Her touch is gentle, and I’ve come to see Jules as the mother hen. Always nurturing, caring, and being supportive. She’s the best friend I wish I had for the last five years.
“No, but I’m getting there,” I say, gesturing to Alan to get me another shot. The boy would make an excellent bartender.
“Just ignore him, he’s a man, and men are idiots sometimes.”
“Girl, I wish it was that easy. It’s hard to ignore someone who is living under the same roof as you, in fact, right across the hall, and then going to the same university.”
“I’m sorry, Ava.” Jules pouts. “You can always come hang out with me if you need to get away. Remington and I live right off campus. It’s literally a block or two away. We have a spare bedroom too.”
“Thank you. Really, we just met and you’re already such a good friend. For once, I’m grateful Vance did something stupid, because it led me to you.”
“Any time, and trust me.” She leans in, her voice a whisper, almost as if she doesn’t want anyone to hear her. “It might not seem like it’s going to get better right now, but last year I was kind of in your shoes. I had moved here after my dad and brother died in a car accident. I had no one. I was alone and needed a friend, and it didn’t help I had other issues going on.” Her eyes cut to her very protective boyfriend who is standing no less than five feet away at all times. “So yeah, believe it or not, I know how you feel.”
“Oh Jules, I’m so sorry.” I frown and pull her into a hug. Her embrace is warm, and I’m reminded why I miss hugs so much. They’re like the glue that holds you through the bad days.
“Another shot, miss?” Alan hollers from behind me and I release Jules and twist around, seconds away from telling him I’d better stop, since I feel the warmth creeping up into my cheeks already. But then I catch Vance staring ice daggers at me from across the room. I’ve been watching him too, and he hasn’t drank a single drop of beer, or liquor. In fact, he hasn’t done anything but sit in the corner of the room brooding.