She watched as his jaw grew tense.
“Do you think I’m a freak?”
“No!” He glared at her. “What you’re asking isn’t something you give on a whim, Isabel. Being in a submissive lifestyle, it demands trust, and openness. I need to know that you will tell me, and use safe words when I push too far, and I will. This isn’t just about being a play toy. It’s so much more.”
He pulled his hands away, and tears flooded her eyes. “There is no other woman in my life.”
“Until a submissive you play with takes that place.”
Edward sighed, and she watched as he rubbed his eyes. This was not what she wanted. She didn’t want to become a problem, and yet she couldn’t stop it. What if he got rid of her? What if he no longer wanted her?
Suddenly, he cupped her face and pressed her against the door.
“What—” She didn’t get time to say anything more as his lips slammed against hers. She cupped his shoulders, not to push him away, but to hold him closer. She didn’t want to let him go.
His tongue ran across her lip, and she opened up to him. Never had she been kissed before, and Edward, he was making her first kiss one to remember. This was what she had been spending most of her nights dreaming about.
Sinking her fingers into his short hair, she held him close, and kissed him back with a passion that she hoped didn’t show her lack of experience. She wanted him, craved his touch, and needed him more than anything else.
Her heart soared as his kiss deepened. The hand on her cheek moved down, grasping her waist, and then cupping her ass.
All too soon, he stopped, pressing his head against hers, and sighing.
She didn’t want it to end.
“This is why I won’t be having a submissive, Isabel. There is no one else I want but you.”
“You want me?” She hadn’t anticipated that.
“Yes, I want you, and I know I shouldn’t.”
“Why?” she asked. There was no reason they couldn’t be together. Nothing stopped them.
“First, our ages. You’re a lot younger than me.”
“I don’t care about that. I’m twenty-five years old. Age means nothing.”
He tapped her thigh where she had cut herself last night. “This means something, Isabel.”
“I can stop.”
She watched as he gritted his teeth.
“Being a submissive, you have to follow instructions. You have to be part of it.”
“I can do that.” She had been following instructions all of her life. Isabel knew better than anyone else how to follow them.
Again, Edward looked sad.
“What is it?” she asked. “Please, give me this chance.” She never thought she would be begging for a man to take her as she was Edward. It was pitiful. For her, it was Edward. She couldn’t lose him. She didn’t want to lose him.
“I’m not denying you, but I’m also not going to completely agree either,” he said. “We’ll take this slow. I shouldn’t have kissed you like that, and I’m sorry.”
“I loved it. It was my first kiss.” There was no point denying it.
“Your first kiss?”
She nodded.