Julieta
Vincent on his knees does nothing to take away from the power and dominance that always surrounds him. It’s commanding really. I get why he easily takes the attention from the room when he enters it. Still, it captivates my attention. I don’t think Vincent is a man brought to his knees often, if ever at all, but he is right here doing it for me, my four simple words having caused it.
“No. It’s not happening.” My mouth drops open in surprise because that’s the last thing I expected him to say.
I’m not sure if I should be happy or angry at this point. Anger because he thinks he can control me but happiness that he wants me to stay. Even after I abandoned him tonight. I regretted it the whole way home, knowing what it’s like to be left alone, but he’s a grown man with all the resources in the world.
Including two parents who deeply love him. Both of whom I will miss. It was getting harder and harder lying to them when I was also falling for them too. Both of his parents treated me like I was their daughter. They accepted me so quickly with open arms. They gave me a taste of what real parents should be. It wasn’t something I was used to after the way I grew up. It was going to be tough leaving them behind with how good they treated me. But I definitely won’t miss the lying.
What I don’t understand is his reasoning to not want to grant me what I’m asking. I’m not the right fit for this. I can’t be what he needs. Not without destroying myself in the process. I mean, this was our first public event, and I ruined it in a fit of my own jealousy. I know the longer this goes on, the more attached I will become to him.
“No?” The hell? He takes my phone from my hand. “Hey!” I try to grab for it, but he slips it into his back pocket. “Give it back.” I hold my hand out. It’s stupid, and I know I sound like a child who is about to stomp their feet.
“I don’t need a tiny blonde showing up here trying to get into this building right now with Ivan Lawson in tow.”
Damn it. He’s right. He knows me better than I thought. Wait, why would my old boss Mr. Lawson be with her? I’d been debating calling Rae, but I still had a war raging inside me. This hadn’t been about the money from the start. That had been some random add-on.
Before he even offered me the deal, I was already agreeing to marry him. It had been about me saving her brother. So many questions had run through my mind. Like, what would happen if I eventually wanted to get out of the deal? Could I work off the debt and pay it another way or something? I didn’t know. So I’d sat there staring at my phone feeling like that same lost little girl left to fend for herself.
“I never should have left that next morning.” Again, I’m surprised by his words.
I thought I might get scolded for taking off and not doing what I’d agreed to. But even as I have the thought, I know it’s dumb. Never once has Vincent treated me that way. In fact, you’d almost think I was in charge at times.
“After we got married?” He nods as he leans forward to move closer to me. I have to admit that it hurt that next morning when he’d left.
I told myself it was par for the course. A good reminder of what we were going to be, but it felt so wrong. Especially after what we’d shared in the shower.
“Why, why shouldn’t you have left?” I want to know his reasoning. I need the words.
“You really don’t know?” His eyes search my face. I have to pull mine from his before he sees too deeply. When people know what you want more than anything, they can use that thing against you.
“I can’t, please don’t,” I practically beg.
He’s dangling a fantasy in front of me. One that’s lived inside of me from the moment I stepped into his office and he asked me to marry him. A fairy tale, really. But I know better: nothing comes that easy in life. Hell, I’ve lived that reality. But now he has it bubbling to the surface where it doesn't belong. I have to remain focused on what the reality of our situation is. I have no other choice. Not if I wanna survive.
He grips my chin, pulling my attention back to him, letting me know he’s not going to let me slip my way out of this conversation. He’s serious about having it. That the tiptoeing around each other that we’ve done over the last week is done with. I am throwing the gauntlet down, but before it can metaphorically hit the floor, Vincent takes hold of it. Looks like he is taking control, and we are doing this head-on.
Everything is about to come out. I can see it in his face. Even in the short time I’ve known him, I’ve learned how he operates. If anything over the last week, he’s been delicate when it comes to me. Doing this dance with me out of courtesy. All of that falls away as he lays his cards out on the table.
“I’m utterly obsessed with you, Jules. It scares the hell out of me, but losing you scares me more. Call me crazy. I likely am at this point, but I’m madly in love with you. And if you think I’ll let you divorce me, you're as crazy as I am.” His eyes never leave mine. I can see not only the determination in them but something else. Something I’m not ready to admit to myself could be true.
My heart pounds harder. Tears slip down my cheeks. “Vincent, please. I know—”
“You are strong, but you’re soft too. That is, once you let someone past that hard shell. I see you, Julieta. I see all of you, and I want it all.” Another one of those walls I’ve tried to keep up begins to crumble.
He really does see me. How? Is this what finding a soulmate feels like? You just connect instantly, but the rest of your body, heart, and brain try to play some game of rationalizing all of this. But the reality is we've connected on a level neither of us understood from the very start. While life took us on different paths, there were so many things that still connected us.
Everything else fades away, and I finally let myself feel all those things I’ve been fighting. I allow myself to take what I want for once. I decide to trust my instincts. They’ve gotten me this far in life. It is too late for any other decision, anyway. My heart was already breaking thinking of walking away. What if I stayed and we could have it all? What if that became my new reality?
“I don’t want to be strong. Not with you.”
“I want you to be whoever you want to be. No matter your choice, I’ll always be there. Whether it be for my fierce wife or the one that needs to lean into me sometimes. I want each and every side of you, Jules. I vow to always be there,” he promises me.
I don’t know who moves first, but our mouths collide. The kiss is hard and untamed. He devours me. When he finally releases my mouth, I realize he’s moved us. We’re now in the bedroom. I gasp for air, trying to get my bearings. So many emotions swirl inside of me. Vincent yanks at my dress, but it doesn't budge. I’m more turned on than I ever have been in my life, but still a laugh spills from me.
“Jules,” Vincent warns, but his lips twitch. “Don’t make me lift your dress, bend you over this bed, and fuck you hard our first time.”
I lick my lips. “That doesn’t sound terrible.”