“Maggie, is she your only sister?” I ask, opening my eyes and looking up at Jagger, who is standing by the door, arms crossed over his chest.
“Yeah.”
“She’s nice.”
He studies me. “Just finish your bath, Willow.”
“Why are you helping me?”
His jaw tics, but he doesn’t answer the question.
“You could just let me die, nobody would ever know.”
“I’m not a fuckin’ monster.”
“Aren’t you?” I whisper.
His eyes flash. “No, I’m not.”
“You really believe that you’re doing the right thing here, don’t you?”
“No,” he growls, “I’m doing what I have to do. Doesn’t mean I like it.”
I close my eyes. “You know, Jagger, in another world ... I could have loved a man like you.”
Silence.
Dead silence.
“Johnny?”
Maggie’s voice fills the space and I open my eyes to see Jagger leaving. I can hear the two of them chatting outside the door, and a moment later, Maggie knocks. “It’s just me, is it okay if I come in?”
“Yeah,” I croak.
She walks in, her eyes going to my no doubt frail and pathetic body in the tub. She has a piece of paper in her hand and a few pills. “I have some pills you can take now, to help with the pain and fever. Angel will be back soon, this is a list of how many times a day you need to take everything.”
“Thank you, I appreciate this.”
She studies me. “You’re sure everything is okay here? I know my brother can be bad news, but I’m not about him hurting women. You’d tell me if he was hurting you.”
This is my chance, my chance to scream from the rooftops that I’ve been kidnapped, yet I find myself wanting to ask another burning question first. A question that has plagued me since the moment I came to this place.
“Do you know what your brother does?”
She swallows, looking away. “Yeah, I do. I don’t agree with it, but him and those guys ... it’s all they’ve ever known.”
“Why does he choose this life?”
She sighs and sits on the edge of the bath. “Johnny and I didn’t have a good childhood. He got abused by our father and our mother killed herself when he was only four. I guess these guys, what he does, it’s his way of having some sort of control over his life. He was always running off the rails and causing problems. Johnny isn’t a bad person at heart, he can be gentle and kind, he’s just got his priorities all wrong.”
“What are you two doing in there?” Jagger barks, walking into the room.
“God, someone is pissy today,” Maggie mutters, standing. “Chill, brother, I was explaining her medication.”
“I’ve got to get her out now, I’ll meet you in the living area when we’re done. Angel just changed the sheets and opened the windows.”
“Ah good, he’s stopped worrying about his possessions and started worrying about his girlfriend,” Maggie slaps Jagger on the shoulder and leaves the room.
Oh, if only she knew the truth. Jagger wordlessly helps me out of the bath and then turns so I can get dressed. It’s a little easier this time, now my body is warm and the medication Maggie gave me is beginning to work. I walk past him when I’m done and go right over to the bed, with its clean sheets, and slide in.
“I’ll come back in the morning to check on her,” Maggie says, closing half the curtains but leaving some fresh air to come in.
“Thanks, Mags,” Jagger murmurs, his eyes going to his sister for a second before meeting mine.
“Do better, brother.”
He nods, and she smiles at me before leaving. When she’s gone, I close my eyes. The bed dips and I know Jagger is sitting on the edge of it. I try to ignore the way my stomach fills with tiny butterflies. He’s right about me, I have some sort of twisted captive obsession with him, and it needs to stop. It’s not real. The things I feel are not real.
“How come she didn’t know who I was?” I murmur, keeping my eyes closed.
“Maggie doesn’t watch television often, she’s the kind of person who just lives in a world where she prefers to know nothing bad. She’s always been the same. But she will see it, I have no doubt about that.”
“What will you do then?”
I open my eyes and look at him.
“I’ll deal with it. Why didn’t you tell her, you had every chance?”
“What’s the point?” I mutter, letting my eyes fall closed. “You’ve made it clear what will happen if I do. I’m tired of fighting. I want to go home, and I just want this to be over and done with.”
Jagger doesn’t say another word.
The bed moves as he gets up, and then the door softly closes and I’m left alone once more.
For the millionth time.
I wonder which time it’ll be that breaks me?