“It doesn’t look like anyone is here,” Bill said. “Or we’ve stepped into a fucking trap. Either way, there’s no point in running.”
“So, what do we do?”
He sighed and cut off the truck. “We wait. And we listen.”
“And talk?” When he didn’t refuse, she soldiered on. This moment felt too precious to waste. For once, he spoke freely, and she was desperate enough to take advantage. “I want to know more about… About the bond.”
He inclined his head her way. “Like what?”
“Was any of it real? My… It felt real—”
“It wasn’t.” He sighed, leaning back against the headrest. His eyes glowed in the darkness, reflecting the moon's light like mirrors. “I felt it too, but that is the way the bond works. The connection feeds off itself, strengthening the attraction between the two mates, exaggerating whatever concern might already exist. To put it bluntly, it wasn’t real. None of it. Just instinct.”
Loren tried to think objectively. His explanation sounded logical enough, but she knew what primal instinct felt like—mostly fear. She’d grown up in an environment that left little room for tender emotions. What happened between them had been…
Different.
“It was more than that,” she whispered. The most horrifying part? She could still feel something tangled and painful lurking in her chest that belonged solely to him. It throbbed the more she focused on it, triggering snatches of memory.
But they weren’t hers.
It was as if a part of her had stolen something from him. Recollections. Snippets… Of her? All of the observations had been from a distance, long before their first official interaction. They were more like hazy images. The many days she spent in the woods behind her father’s house. Her smell.
The unexpectedly intimate nature of those insights made her pulse skip.
Were they real?
Yes,a part of her insisted.They always were.
“I could feel you,” she said, struggling to put the concept into words. From his harsh intake of air, she knew he understood exactly what she meant. “Your emotions. Sometimes what you were thinking. Was that part of it, too?”
“Yes. And I could feel… You.”
The tension in his voice made her heart race. She swallowed, her throat so tight it hurt to breathe. “Why did you do it? Why? If you didn’t want me, then…”
“Because I couldn’t bear to watch you suffer. I couldn’t—but don’t believe that makes me a hero.” He shook his head, as self-deprecating as ever. “I was selfish. The motives for forcing a mating bond aren’t always entirely noble.”
She shuddered at the prospect. “How do you mean?”
“There are other benefits. I’m sure you can think of a few on your own.” He inclined his head, meeting her stare. “Remember how I tracked you while you were with Kyle?”
She nodded.
“Our senses are heightened while mated. Expanded. One of the reasons Lukka was so opposed to what I did is that it could be seen as a direct challenge. A mated rogue is more dangerous than a lone wolf, so to speak.”
“So why didn’t you want one? A mate,” she clarified.
He stared off into the distance as if stunned by the question. Perhaps, he hadn’t really delved into the reasoning himself.
“You know about… That I lost someone close to me once,” he finally said. “I think a part of me was unwilling to go through that pain again, but…”
He trailed off without stating the obvious.
Because, despite that supposed fear, in the end, that very thing had happened. Loss. Pain.
“Hurting you was the last thing in the world I wanted. I need you to understand that. Loren—” He reached out. She could see the regret dawn over his face the second his hand brushed hers—but it was too late. Their fingers entwined, and he didn’t pull away.
Like always, his heat seeped through her skin, igniting a million conflicting sensations. Deep inside, she could feel that twisted mass of emotion unravel a little. One sentiment broke free, clearer than ever.