He was removing the last shield I had to protect myself, and I held my breath while his fingers danced over the backs of my thighs.
“Are you sure?” Kaleem asked, and with my eyes closed and my cheeks pressed into the bed, I nodded.
“I’m sure,” I answered. “I want you.”
This was a part of me I couldn’t imagine giving to anyone else. It was so crazy how angry I’d been at Kaleem only for us to end up here, but I wasn’t going to lie to myself as if I didn’t trust him explicitly with my body and safety—my heart, not so much.
Yet, he has it, a voice said in my mind, and my eyes popped open.
I gasped loudly when Kaleem’s fingers slid between my ass cheeks to my entrance, effectively chasing my troubling thoughts away. I fisted the sheet, the sound of his fingers playing with my wetness mixing with our heavy breathing, and I arched against his touch.
When his finger slipped into me, I cried out, and I felt his breath on my shoulder.
“Shh,” he hushed me, his fingers torturing me sweetly like nothing I’d ever felt before. “I’ve got you.”
When his finger was removed from my core, I felt I’d go mad from its absence, but that was only until I felt the tip of his member. I went still, his cock teasing my sensitive bundle of nerves until it journeyed to my waiting entrance.
Kaleem kissed my back, shoulder, neck, and cheek and swiftly grabbed my chin and cheeks when he entered me. I cried out and could not bury my face into the mattress to silence the scream. It echoed through the room, and Kaleem smiled against my shoulder.
He slid deeper, stroking slowly until I felt the moment I was no longer innocent.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered against my skin while I whimpered, his hand still preventing me from hiding my face. “I wanted to hear you scream. I’ll never forget that beautiful scream.”
He pulled out of me slowly and embedded himself again, and my response morphed into a strangled cry. The mixture of pain and pleasure was like nothing I’d ever felt, and my thighs began to shake uncontrollably.
“Kaleem,” I cried, for I was losing control of my body, and he released my face.
“It’s okay,” he groaned while rocking into my body, and I pressed my forehead to the bed, all while I arched my ass.
The pain was indescribable, and I wanted more of it. I wanted more of Kaleem. Goddess, I’d dreamt of this for so long. He felt amazing,thisfelt amazing andright, and while it wasn’t how I’d imagined I’d lose my innocence, in an old motel, I wouldn’t trade this night for another.
By the time I climaxed and then climaxed again, I felt a new sensation being birthed in me, a crippling sadness because this was the first and the last time I’d be able to give my body to Kaleem—to my mate. Still, it was made painfully clear my body was now his and only his forever.
***
When I opened my eyes, I recalled my previous night’s actions in seconds, and Kaleem lying beside me was a definite reminder.
He was butt naked and on his stomach with half of his face buried in the pillow. I stared at him for a minute, taking in the sight of him because this was the first and the last time I’d wake up beside him.
My eyes traveled down his body, over every curve and muscle, then back to his face. He looked so at peace with his legs hanging off the bed I couldn’t help smiling.
Last night I’d decided to take this step as a final goodbye, and I’d given him a part of me no one else would be able to take away. We’d always have last night, no matter what.
Kaleem was always a gentleman when we first met despite the intense attraction between us, and I hadn’t been with anyone since. Colin made sure no man got close enough for anything to happen, but he’d wasted his time. I lacked interest in sleeping with anyone.
No matter my feelings toward Kaleem over the years, I couldn’t bring myself to be with anyone else. Whenever I’d thought of losing my virginity, I could only think of Kaleem, and of course, back then, that pissed me off.
As for Colin, I knew he’d given Adronus and others an order to keep an eye on me, hence their insistence in butting into my life. It was doubtful they even knew the real reason Colin wanted them to keep an eye on me.
Honestly, what would I do? The man was a monster that no one wanted to cross, and I knew that. So what threat was I really for me to be watched so righteously while my father didn’t receive the same bombardment of bullshit nagging? He was the one that challenged Colin.
Those fools weren’t equipped enough to use their own damn minds, or perhaps they were aware of how strange it was but didn’t dare ask questions.
Still, they were sheep and Colin the wolf that was controlling them.
Without waking Kaleem, I got off the bed, scribbled a note on a paper, and quietly got dressed. I gathered my things into the backpack I’d carried and slipped out of the room, but I stared at Kaleem one last time before closing the door.
My body was sore in the best way, and I closed the door quietly. Waking up with him would be too painful. I simply couldn’t handle that.