“You have no idea how much you hurt me, Kaleem,” I growled, and he didn’t respond.
However, he held my stare, and it was as if he was absorbing my words. I wanted him to see my pain because I’d imagined saying these words to him for so long it almost felt unreal that I was doing so now. As two years had turned into five, six, and nine, I’d accepted that I’d never see him again.
I had to find my own peace, and my way of doing so was through anger. This was now who I was.
“Yes, I know, I kept secrets,” I added when his lips parted as if he meant to speak. “But—you gave me a choice, and the second I answered, you were done with me and had nothing further to say. You didn’t hesitate.”
A group walked by the tiny alley we were hiding in, and I took a breath. This argument, it was long overdue but also pointless after so long. It wasn’t going to change anything.
Even so, it felt good to get everything off my chest. I’d imagined slapping him so many times, but standing before him now, doing so would be unnecessary. He was silent and allowed me to speak, and I appreciated that because there was nothing he could say that would change things.
“You made your choices, Kaleem, and I made mine, but you wanted the truth, so there it is,” I sighed, saying all I needed to. “Now you know who I really am and why you and I will never have a future together.”
***
Kaleem
Beside me, Diana was silent while I drove her home. She’d calmed down some time ago, but there was still a thriving tension between us that was even worse than before.
I’d wanted the truth, but the reality just made everything worse.
I’d hoped a chat with her and getting the chance to properly apologize for my actions would mend things enough for us to be civil. Instead, I learned that Diana’s troubles went deeper than I could ever imagine, and I made them worse.
I’d always sensed her power as a werewolf, that she was strong-willed and brave but never had I imagined she was from Colin’s bloodline. Her being his niece placed her quite far up on the ladder of command and a child of hers…
Colin’s bloodline was new without centuries of ancestors who branched off to extend the family. To Colin, who Diana ended up with mattered, and I was the last person he’d want her to be with.
I’d been lost for words as she’d talked about her hatred for me. I would be lying if I said it didn’t hurt to hear her say those things, but I couldn’t blame her either. She’d suffered far worse than me having to listen to a painful truth.
Anyone would have been broken by the life she was subjected to and the way I’d rejected her. I’d been harsh and as cold as she’d said, but my belief back then was that the pain would fade.
I hadn’t considered this outcome.
I’d thought her pack would find a new territory, and she’d find someone to care for and protect her, as gut-wrenching as that thought was. I’d never regretted my position as alpha until that day when I knew I had to give her a choice, to choose her pack or me.
To some, asking her to choose would seem cruel, but finding each other had been like a fairytale, and it was then time for us to face reality. She was my mate and Luna, and matters between our packs were heating up. I hadn’t realized how much until Colin attacked that night, and already suffering from rejecting Diana, I had lost it and as a result, almost killed him.
I’d so badly wanted to. I’d wanted to rip him to shreds, but I’d thought of Diana, that Colin being dead would leave her unprotected, and he was the strongest among the pack at the time. Perhaps I should have put an end to him because I knew Mathieu, and he was a great man and father.
No doubt he would have found them a territory.
Diana was staying just outside of Wolfcreek, and I made a face when I pulled into the motel she was staying in.
“You don’t have to stay here,” I said while parking. “You’re welcome to stay at the packhouse until Colin arrives.”
The motel was clean, on the outside at least, but this wasn’t safe for a young wolf.
However, Diana shook her head and opened her door. “You know that wouldn’t be a good idea. Thanks.”
Perhaps she was right, and maybe it was a little too late for me to be offering concern. I’d banished her and her people and never bothered to check up on her. I’d thought doing so would only bring about unnecessary pain.
A person addicted to sweets couldn’t work at a candy factory, and that was what seeing Diana would have been like. That was what it felt like now. She was my drug, and she was in arm’s reach.
If only she knew how much I loved her, I thought while watching her walk to her car door. We’d known each other for a short time, but in that time, she became my entire universe, and she still was.
My actions had said differently, I was aware of that, but I’d thought I was saving her from further agony. There was no way she could have chosen her pack, and we remained mated. There were too many factors to consider, so I did what I felt was right.
I got out of the car, and with a few strides, I was standing behind her while she tried to unlock her door.