I shake my head, trying to clear the thoughts of Neil. I hate thinking about him, but it happens every so often.
“Of course,” I tell him as I head to grab the pot of coffee. I walk it back to the counter and fill up the two cups, then add the splash of cream and sugar to Paul’s cup.
“Thanks,” Garrett says, and he flashes me a quick smile. He really does have a beautiful smile. One I could sit and stare at for hours.
“You’re staring again,” Harper whisper-yells from behind me.
“Fuck,” I hiss under my breath. “I can’t help it,” I admit.
“You could always ask him out,” Harper suggests.
“Don’t think so,” I tell her.
“Why not? This isn’t the eighteen-hundreds. Women can ask men out. We can be assertive and make our wants and desires known and not be considered sluts.”
“I know that. I’m just not ready, don’t know if I’ll ever be,” I tell her honestly. I can feel the sadness coming over me when I think about not ever finding love again. I see how happy all the couples in my life are, and yet I’m over here drowning in the mess that was my married life and the aftermath I’ve been left with. Life definitely isn’t fair to everyone, and I’m proof of that.
“Thanks for the treat and coffee. We’re taking off, but I’ll be back on Friday with the other unit,” Garrett calls out.
“Thanks, see you then,” I tell him before both guys walk out the door.
Once the guys are gone, I turn to head back into the kitchen. Seeing the new oven puts a smile back on my face. I can’t wait to start using it. We don’t have anything on the schedule to bake right now, but I need something to keep me busy, so I pull out everything to make some of our basic chocolate chip cookies. They’ll be a great thing to test out baking times with, and before I know it, a couple of hours have passed and a few dozen cookies line the counter, the different racks all marked with little stickie notes with times written on them.
“Wow, you’ve been busy,” Harper says as she joins me in the kitchen.
“I guess I have been,” I tell her as I look around at the massive piles of cookies. “I needed something to get lost in, and, well, cookies are an easy thing to do just that. Plus, it was a good time to test out the oven.”
“I agree, and it looks like ten minutes is the winner,” Harper says as she checks each batch.
I take another look at each try and come to the same conclusion. “I agree. It will be interesting to see if the bake time is adjusted similarly with everything else.”
“We’ll just have to test it out, and hope and pray we don’t ruin too many things in the process.”
“I say we start with less time and add to it. We can always bake something longer but can’t take it back once burnt. If the cookies cooked in two less minutes, maybe we start cakes out with six less minutes and go from there?” I suggest.
“Sounds good to me. I’ll start a chart that we can keep up for a while with the new cook times.”
“Perfect!”
“What are you doing tonight?” Harper asks.
“Just dinner at my parents’ and then home with the kids, what about you?”
“I’m not sure yet. I’ll probably work on packing.”
“I still can’t believe you’re moving. I’m going to miss you like crazy.”
“It’s still so surreal, but I need to do this.”
“I know, and I’m so damn happy for the two of you. Y’all deserve each other.”
“Thanks for that. I still have to pinch myself sometimes to make sure the whirlwind is real life.”
“I’m sure the orgasms prove that this is your real life.” I smirk at Harper.
“I am one lucky lady. He definitely knows how to use the goods.” She winks at me.
“I don’t need the details.” I hold up a hand, stopping her from saying any more.