As we ride away from my latest home, I sniff back my tears. Is this what my life is like now? Bouncing from home to home, aimless? This neighborhood was my entire life. The solid foundation I could always return to if the real world spat me out. Or so I thought.
Now my security blanket is nonexistent.
I watch as the suburbs, encased in arching trees, pass us by and turn into the hard architectural lines of the city where Karl’s new penthouse awaits. From the front seat, I look at the rearview mirror and catch a glimpse of Bren and Sofia in the back, Addy’s car seat between them, and Sofia’s arm outstretches to rub the back of Bren’s neck.
It’s all I can do to hold in a sob deep in my chest before it gurgles out. Mom used to do that to Dad. She did it so often, I thought nothing of it at the time. I just remember Dad would be driving, and Mom would rest her arm on his backrest and rub the back of his neck or run her fingers through his hair.
God, I miss them. But I’m still so damned mad at them. Angry for leaving me so soon, when I still need them. Mad for everything they kept from me.
“If you change your mind,” Sofia says from behind me, “I’m one phone call away. Ileana would take you back in a heartbeat.”
“And so would we,” Bren adds. “We have plenty of room at the new place.”
I know, I think, and smirk, my mood lifting again. If they only knew I’ve stayed there already.
Maybe my future is unsteady at the moment, but what I can do is enjoy my present. And my present, luckily, is on the arm of the man voted the sexiest man alive by nearly every magazine worldwide.
Maybe the curse is breaking.
* * *
After Bren and Sofia leave,I look around at my new room in Karl’s penthouse. It’s mostly unpacked now, and I stare at my temporary future. Watching Sofia and Bren is so much like having a younger version of my parents around. I tried distracting myself by holding Addy and playing with her the entire time. But now they’re all gone, and I’m left with nothing but my longing for my family.
A soft knock at the door breaks my wandering thoughts. “Come in.”
Karl comes into view, and his wide grin vanishes at the same time his face falls when he sees me. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” I lie.
“Come here.” In three long strides, he reaches me and wraps his arms around me. I press my cheek to his hard chest, and he cups the back of my head in the most tender way while rubbing circles on my back. “Your nose is red, and you’re about to cry.”
“No, I’m not.” I let out a nervous giggle.
“Listen, Lo. If you don’t want to move in, you don’t have to. Say the words, and I’ll get the movers to take your stuff back to Ileana’s. We can still date or just be friends if you want out of the bet. Just don’t cry, doll.”
I laugh and wipe the corner of my eye, and take a step away from him, so he has to let me go from his embrace. “I don’t regret moving in. It’s just . . .”
“What?” Karl asks when my thought trails off.
“It’s silly. Really. It’s just being around Bren and Sofia together. I don’t know how to explain it, but seeing them together . . . I’ve just been thinking a lot about my own parents today. That’s all.”
Karl laughs. “You know, even before Bren met Sofia, all of us in the band would call him ‘Dad’ as a joke. He hated it.”
I laugh. “Really?”
“Yeah. He’s always been so serious, and . . . paternal. Like the dad of the band, you know? Of course, the more he told us to stop, the more we called him that. And then when Addy came along, well, he could no longer fight it.”
“Thanks, Karl,” I say.
“For what?”
“For cheering me up.”
Karl leaves me to explore my new home. I’ve been here before, visiting Sofia or sitting for Addy, but it’s different now that I’ll be living here for a while.
My favorite features in the apartment are the black marble floors and the entire wall of windows that displays the Kansas City skyline. I’ve always loved this view, and I can’t wait for nighttime when I can sit by the window with a hot beverage and watch the city nightlights turn on all around us.
The main room is an open space. Beyond the foyer, the living room and dining room are in view from the elevator entrance. Karl gave me a key card to access the top floor from the elevator. Having no front door, only an elevator, seems unreal. What my life has come to seems surreal.