“Desire, Carolina.” Letting his grip off the countertop, he cupped my face in his hands, lifting my face to meet his. “I see it right there, in your eyes right now.”
I dropped my gaze from him and let out a breath. He wasn’t wrong, but damn him for knowing. The slight buzz from the wine electrified the sensation of his hands on my skin, and I had zero willpower to break free.
Hector grabbed me by the waist and lifted me to sit on the countertop. My eyes widened with the surprise of the movement, but then my legs parted, making room for him to press his body against mine. The air crackled around us.
He ran his fingers through my hair and cupped the back of my head, holding me in place. “Hector,” I moaned his name. My breath was coming in choppy, and I didn’t have the power in my limbs to push him away. I wasn’t even sure I wanted to anymore.
“Tell me. Tell me you didn’t want me then, and tell me you don’t want me now. Set me straight, Carolina. This is your chance. Tell me I imagined it all.”
My eyes met his because I was no chicken-shit. I could see from behind the light stubble that his jaw was clenched as he waited for my answer. “I can’t,” I said with a challenging gaze. “It wouldn’t be true.” His eyes roamed my face looking for sincerity in it, finding an invitation instead.
His other arm was now around my waist, pulling me flush against him. He let go of my body and brought his hand back up, this time finding my lips. With his thumb, he rubbed my bottom lip, swiping from one side to the other, while my hands pressed against his hard chest.
“I’ve wanted to touch you like this for so long.” His voice was deeper and now suddenly raspy. When he spoke, my skin broke into goosebumps, and my legs wrapped around his waist without my command, pulling him closer.
When his lips finally made contact with mine, the last nine years fell away. Every reason we had for not being together was gone. My hatred, even, had mellowed to a low flicker in the distance.
It was a gentle kiss—at first. He explored my mouth with restraint and grazed my teeth tentatively with the tip of his tongue. The smell of his musk mingled with the crisp taste of the wine still on our lips, and a moan escaped me. The hand he had cupping the back of my head bunched into a fist in response to the sound, sending a prickling sensation through my scalp. But the pain mixed with pleasure, and I could not voice a protest. I didn’t want to.
My eyes flew open when I felt the length of him hardening through the layers of clothing. His slacks, my pantyhose, and underwear separated me from what my bodyneeded.
I tightened the muscles of my legs to grip him even closer to me if that were possible. I needed to feelallof him. He pulled me away by the hair still in his fist, and he chuckled. The void I felt at his mouth no longer on mine was unbearable. The need for him was unmatched by anything I had felt for anyone, ever—by a longshot.
“My eager little Carolina,” he said in a breathy voice. “We have plenty of time. Let me enjoy this.”
Hector’s grip pulled my hair, forcing my head back and exposing my neck to him. I grabbed on to his broad shoulders for balance. He kissed my jaw, then trailed kisses down my neck.
“I love you,” he whispered, and my every muscle turned to stone. My hands dropped away from him and found the counter. My legs unraveled from him, retreating from his body and finding their way back to mine.
“What did you say?”
“I love you. I’ve loved for a long time.”
My face twisted at his words, and I pushed him away. He let go of my hair so he could look at my face, which was now serious. He groaned with frustration, but he stepped back and away from me.
“You were talking aboutdesire, Hector. Desire and love are two very different things.”
“You must have known,” he countered, now looking angry.
“No. You didn’t love me. Someone who loves someone doesn’t put them through what you have put me through.”
“Someone who loves someone,” he said, his teeth gritted, “will do anything, even if it means staying away for nearly a decade, before hurting them.”
“What are you talking about?” I jumped off the counter and straightened my dress.
“Carolina, do you think I could have kept you, knowing that either way things played out, I would be hurting you?”
“Hurting me?” I shook my head. None of his words were making sense. “What are you talking about?”
“I was in a classic no-win situation. If we had been weak at the conference hotel that night, the rumors would have been true, and they would have ruined your career.”
“But we weren’t. We didn’t do anything wrong.”
“Like that mattered? Look at what happened anyway.”
“Hector, that wasn’t your fault.”
“Yes, it was!” His voice raised a little. “And what if we had done things right? What if after my divorce came through, we had gotten together? What then? The hospital would have had a problem with it because I was your boss. But maybe I tried to solve the problem for you and left Heartland. Maybe I found another hospital so we could stay together—”