Chapter 4
The Long Shift
The first day of rounds with our new attending ran smoothly. Dr. Medina was mostly quiet; we all knew he was assessing us, making his mind up about our worth as doctors. The other residents were shifty and insecure with their answers, but not me.
Having a secret with him gave me armor. He felt human to me now, no longer the god he still was to my peers. My confidence must have shown through because he was receptive to all my treatment plans and encouraged me to keep speaking. In short, I was killing it. Poor choice of words for a doctor, but I didn’t care. I was.
I would have been on cloud nine if it weren’t for the dark cloud Dr. Keach kept sending my way. He stood next to me always, so I could clearly hear his heavy breathing and puffing.I get it, Keach, I get it. You are pissed.
But his fragile little ego wasn’t my problem. If he wanted attention from his mentors, he’d have to work hard for it, just like anyone else. I pushed him out of my thoughts, so I could focus on what was important—caring for our patients.
Dr. Medina looked down at the list on his tablet. “Did we cover everyone for rounds who is not on Dr. Ramirez’s clinical trial?” he asked.
“Yes,” I said. “We have five potential trial participants left to assess and one participant already on the trial.” I always called them participants. I hated the term ‘subjects.’ It made patients feel like lab rats, which they most definitely weren’t. I had a hard enough time educating the public on what clinical trials were, persuading them that they would still get treatment even if it wasn’t the experimental one, without making them feel likethings.
“Great. I will join you. The rest of you—get to work. You have your marching orders,” said Dr. Medina.
The circle broke, leaving me standing there awkwardly with him.
“Whenever you are ready,” he said.
“Excuse me?” I asked.
“Lead the way, Dr. Ramirez,” he said with obvious impatience in his voice. My first slip of the day.
“Yes, of course, Doctor. This way.”
We saw my first three patients, and Dr. Medina introduced himself as a new member of their care team. He was confident and charismatic, so each of them instantly fell into a trust with him. I was most impressed when he lingered in Valentina’s room and got her to warm up to him. She was so guarded, she hardly let anyone in.
I opened up the rounds, even though it was just the two of us in the room with Valentina.
“Valentina Almonte. Age twenty-four. Diagnosed two months ago. Accepted into the trial last month. Blinded standard treatment protocol for the last week.” Valentina’s arms danced like a symphony conductor’s, and I paused speaking long enough to pin her hands down with my own. I arched an eyebrow as a warning.
“Okay, okay,” she said. “I give.” She squealed in her bed.
“Patient is responding well to chemoradiation.” I let go but continued to pin her with my stare.
“You have a good team of doctors here, Miss Almonte,” he said.
“Valentina, please.”
Dr. Medina took his time in the room, reading her chart. He set it down on the counter in front of her bed, and Valentina took the opportunity to turn to me. She mouthed,oh my gawd,dropped her jaw, and fisted her hands to motion humping the air. My eyes widened with alarm, and I begged her to stop, waving her down as discreetly as I could. Dr. Medina didn’t notice a thing.
“Valentina, I look forward to being on your care team.”
“Thanks, Doctor,” she said while batting her eyelashes. She was so obviously flirting with him, and I couldn’t help but smile. I approved of anything that would bring her spirits up, and if that was Dr. Medina, then I would gladly throw him into the fire.
Dr. Medina caught me grinning like an idiot as we walked into the hallway. He rolled his eyes. “Stop,” he said sternly.
“Stop what?”
“You know what.”
“You must get that a lot, Doctor,” I said, batting my eyelashes just as Valentina had. His eyes narrowed. I only stopped when I noticed the set of his jaw, and I wondered if he was too stiff and serious for a bit of joking banter. I checked myself and schooled my face back to its professional side.
“I apologize, Doctor. I forgot myself. If it makes you feel any better, that’s the first time I’ve seen Valentina smile in weeks. Her spirits have been really low. With all due respect, if interacting with you will help her emotionally, I’m willing to sacrifice your dignity a bit to her whims. On the whole, she’s harmless.”
“I feel used, Dr. Ramirez,” he said before turning to walk away from me. He shook his head all the way down the hallway, but I could swear, even by just looking at the back of his head, that he was snickering.