So what?Trey wanted to ask. He’d spoken true. He knew his place at Bluegrass Ranch, and it wasn’t in the training facility—at least not for any longer than it took to make sure the people who’d signed up and paid got their scheduled slot.
Outside, he paused and looked up into the clear, dark night sky. He felt the weight of that sky settle on his shoulders, and he took a breath as he tried to hold it up. As he released the air in his lungs, all the troubles and cares of the world went with it, and he took a single step toward Thunder, who he’d saddled and ridden over from Dixon Dreams tonight.
Beth had driven her SUV, but Lawrence must’ve walked, because there wasn’t another vehicle besides Rob’s near the stables to his left.
“Trey,” she said behind him, and he ducked his head and turned back toward her.
“I don’t want to talk to Spur about training,” he said. “I don’t even know if I’m going to be at Bluegrass for much longer.”
“What do you mean?” She looked up at him, and with the glow of the half-moon, he found the confusion on her face.
“Baby.” He took her into his arms, where she pressed her cheek against his heartbeat. He didn’t know how to say what he’d been thinking about in the past few weeks since Thanksgiving. He supposed if there was one person he could—and should—tell, it was Beth.
Hadn’t that been his big mistake with Sarah? Hadn’t she accused him of bottling everything up and not trusting her with the deepest parts of his heart?
After she’d broken their engagement, Trey had only retreated further inside himself. He put his head down, and he got the job done. He slept when he couldn’t stay awake any longer, and he ate when his body demanded he did.
He’d improved in the past six months as he figured out how to be himself again. Since the day his mother and father had told him to pray about what he should do with Beth’s proposal, he felt like his life had been put in a blender and set on high.
He was married now, for one. Not just on paper either, as he and Beth had been sharing a bedroom since Thanksgiving. He hadn’t quite gotten up the courage to go to church with Beth and TJ, but he’d told her a few days ago he’d go to the Christmas service this weekend.
“Five days from now is Christmas Eve,” he said, pulling away from Beth. “Who’s going to want to race their horse on Christmas Eve?” He also needed to find a way to start training Somebody’s Lady during daylight hours. The Sweetheart Classic wasn’t run in the middle of the night, and she’d need to run in front of a crowd too.
The to-do list never seemed to end, and Trey pushed against the pure feelings of overwhelm as they threatened to suffocate him. He pressed his eyes closed, the burning there testifying to him that he really needed to get to bed.
“Wait,” he said. “I scheduled daylight time on the outdoor track.”
“You’re doing that thing where you continue conversations out loud that you’ve only had with yourself,” Beth teased. “Come on. I’ll help you with Somebody’s Lady, so we can both get to sleep sooner.” She slid her arm around his waist, and the two of them started toward the stables.
Inside, they found Rob and Lawrence, and with everyone, the tack got cleaned and put away, Somebody’s Lady got checked, brushed down, and bedded.
“I put the Sweetheart Classic on my calendar,” Lawrence said, grinning at him and Beth as they left the stables. “I can’t wait to see that horse really run.” He clapped Trey on the shoulder, which made him laugh.
“Thanks, Lawrence. I’m sure you’ll be the only one there.” Trey didn’t blame his family. They were all extraordinarily busy, and he could admit he hadn’t even known Spur was dating Olli until the man was days away from proposing to her.
Spur did have a knack for knowing what he wanted and going after it once he’d identified it. Trey wished he was as courageous as his brother. As he got in the passenger seat while Beth started the car, he decided to just say what had been on his mind.
“Beth,” he said. “I don’t know what the future holds, obviously, but I’ve been thinking a lot about where I should be.” He glanced at her, but it was too dark to truly see her face. “It might not be Bluegrass Ranch.”
“I still don’t know what you mean.”
“I mean, we’re married now, and maybe I should be working Dixon Dreams with you. Full-time. We could work it as a family and teach TJ everything he needs to know to inherit the place when he’s older.” He spoke very quietly, the inner workings of his mind coming out in somewhat coherent sentences.
Beth gripped the steering wheel, the tension between them real and palpable. She took a deep breath as she turned onto the highway and headed toward her farm. Only a minute down the road, she turned again, the white gravel in her driveway crunching under her tires.
“We should probably start thinking about a different name then,” she said. “If that’s what you really want.”
Trey smiled into the darkness. He hadn’t seen this curve in his life—he’d always envisioned himself living and working at Bluegrass Ranch. It sure seemed like the Lord was leading him down a different path, though, and Trey hoped He’d keep illuminating his footsteps so Trey would know if he was about to step off a cliff or not.
Chapter Fourteen
Beth stepped out of the master closet and into her heels, looking up as Trey came into the bathroom. He hadn’t even started getting ready for church yet. Beth didn’t want to push him, but he had said he’d come with her this week.
She was an expert in making up excuses for why she couldn’t attend family gatherings, church, anything she didn’t want to attend. Trey matched her in that regard, but he’d said he’d come for the Christmas sermon.
“Morning,” she said coolly.
“Yes, it is,” he said grumpily. He’d be fine once he’d been awake for longer than five minutes. Beth knew, as she’d been dealing with this growly version of Trey for over two months now. He’d shower and brush his teeth, and she’d somehow feel like she’d held them up from leaving, the way she usually did.