Chapter Twelve
An afternoon with Arne was guaranteed to be a pleasant distraction, especially when he made love to me in that lovely meadow. The sun warmed my skin while my mate warmed all of me. He was such a considerate lover, the kind who never took his own pleasure without being sure I had mine. Even if I tried to make it about him, he said it was about us.
He also made it about me when he wanted to and refused to acknowledge the hypocrisy of it all. And it was so sweet, how could I argue? A girl would have to be a fool not to want his attentions.
We rode slowly back to court afterward, the vibration of our mount’s hooves the only thing that kept me at all grounded as I nestled in Arne’s arms. Sometimes I was amazed at the many things he was good at. Horse breeding, an ancient art—green energy production, a modern skill. Lovemaking, of course, but more than that, he had the ability to make me feel safe and warm even when my responsibilities weighed heavily.
But although I sailed through dinner and the rest of the evening, as soon as I went to bed, those worries came tumbling back in force. Bors led the parade of fears and doubts, but he was quickly followed by the faces of the people in my kingdom who needed so many things, and then the money I’d committed to solar and wind power, among other things.
The roofs I’d seen that needed repairing, the homes that needed paint or other repairs. And I hadn’t even begun to invest in a thousand other things. My people had gone forever without electricity. Wouldn’t they prefer a solid roof?
The list of things needed was endless. Education. Adequate food. Transportation. Modern indoor plumbing. Clothing. Childcare for those who worked outside the home or needed some time uninterrupted within the home.
I tossed myself from one side of the bed to the other, finally coming all the way awake twisted in the sheets until I could barely move my arms and legs. Arne had wanted to come up with me, but I’d been so tired, I just wanted to sleep.
Now I wished I had his reassuring presence next to me. Because everything I was doing was wrong. My people counted on me to make the right decisions, but I absolutely was not doing that. And if I didn’t, who would?
The only other members of the ruling family were Jillian, who did not want the throne, and Bors who would steal it and then continue beggaring the kingdom.
I had to do better. Had to use the resources at my command to meet their needs.
The sun was still abed when I rose from mine, dressed, and practically tumbled down the stairs to find Eleanor. She was staying in the main part of the castle, but I didn’t remember what room, so I ran from room to room, peeking inside and waking most of the occupants. By the time I stumbled upon her peeking out of her door, dressed in her nightgown and robe, I was frantic.
I grabbed her arm and dragged her behind me toward the stairwell.
“Your Majesty”—she tried to slow our progress—“Can’t I get dressed? I’m in my nightwear.”
“What?” I continued to tow her along. “No, we can’t wait. I need to take care of this matter right now.” After a moment, Eleanor stopped fighting me and let me take her to the office Arne used and she was now sharing since they were working on the project together.
“Can you at least tell me what this is about? Is there some kind of emergency?”
I let go of her arm and moved around the desk to take the seat there. “Sit down. I need to discuss something with you.”
“All right.” She belted her robe more tightly and smoothed her hair then sat up straight. “I am at your service.”
I looked at our energy consultant who usually wore impeccable business clothing and never had a hair out of place. “Are you barefoot?”
“Yes, but I can go get slippers or clothes, if you don’t mind.”
The absurdity of the situation rolled over me. The poor thing must think I was insane. “I apologize for shanghaiing you down here. But you can return to your bed in a few minutes. I just need you to make a call.”
Despite her dishevelment, Eleanor still looked dignified when she held out her hand. “I’m afraid I don’t have my phone here, so I’ll have to borrow yours or use the landline.”
I shoved the desk phone toward her.
“Now, who shall I call?”
“I need you to cancel all the orders.”
Eleanor withdrew her hand. “I beg your pardon?”
“I have overstepped and made a lot of decisions that I now realize were not to the benefit of my people. Well, they are, but they do not meet their immediate needs.”
A frown creased her forehead. “Your subjects don’t need electricity?”
“Not as much as roofs. And food.”
“I see.” Eleanor in her bathrobe had more dignity than most people in the business suit she would have preferred to wear. “Perhaps before we try to cancel this custom and non-cancellable order, we should go over the benefits of continuing with the project I know is dear to your heart. Your Majesty, not to denigrate the other needs of your people, but the investments you’ve made are for the long-term good of this country—wherever it is.”