Ian:What do you need?
Jake:I can be there in 15.
Coop:I can be there in 2.
A little laughworked its way up past the knot of tension.
Me:I don’t know. I wasn’t—they’re in her room. They locked the cats in here. Still have homework. But I cannot focus.
Archie:Come here if you need to. Fuck, I can come get you.
A series of dittos followed.
As much as I wanted to say yes to all the offers—because seriously, the last place I wanted to be was here—I couldn’t.
Me:I can’t leave the cats.
Archie:Fine, then I’ll come there.
Me:I don’t know if that would help right now. Just… can someone help me get focused on this?
Ian:Hang on.
My phone rang,cutting off the music, and I hit answer. “Hey,” I said to Ian. I kept my voice low. I was pretty sure whatever they were doing, they weren’t listening to me, but I really didn’t want to find out.
“Hang on for a couple more seconds…” Then there were some beeps. “Jake’s on.” Another beep. “Archie.” Finally… “And that’s Coop.”
“Hi.”
“Hey, baby girl,” Jake said. “What do you need to get done tonight, give us a list…”
And just like that, I had backup for my fraying concentration. I gave them the list of assignments. Just talking about it helped me organize it. I dragged my laptop and backpack closer and then wrote the list down on a notecard so I could cross them off as I went.
They stayed on the phone for the next two hours, occasionally commenting, always responding if I asked a question, and helping to keep me on track. By the time I finished the last sentence on the short French paper I had to turn in the next day, the clammy, crawly feeling and sick nausea had gone away.
The cramps were still there—yay—but I could survive those. My phone was nearly dead when we hung up. I got my backpack squared away, cleaned up my food trash and crept through the silent apartment to the kitchen to throw it away.
After a pitstop in the bathroom, I crawled into bed with my heating pad and put my phone on the charger.
Archie:It’s going to be okay. Call, text, whatever you need, okay?
Jake:I’ll be there early tomorrow, promise.
Coop:I’m right around the corner, you know that.
Ian:You’re a rock star and my hero. The fact you shine even when everyone around you gets in the muck just makes me adore you more.
The messages buoyed me.I sent a kiss emoji and a night to each of them, then set the phone down on the nightstand. One by one, the cats all tumbled onto the bed to curl up with me, and I hugged Jake’s pillow as I leaned into the heating pad.
Sleep proved elusive. My mind kept running in circles, like the cats doing rabbit races from topic to topic. The buzz of my phone pulled me upright to look at it. There was a message from Ian with the wordsplay meunder an audio file.
Tiddles complained when I snagged my ear buds and then hit play. The soft melody of his guitar combined with his voice made me grin. Two songs, a second one arrived as I was listening to the first.
I saved the files to my phone and then put them in a playlist. I listened to both of them twice before I answered his text.
Me:I love them. Thank you.
Ian:Wanted to give you a lullaby, sleep well.