I glimpsed behind me, hoping he didn’t see Jack or Blake, but he must have seen them. Why else would he look so mad?
Luckily, the car drove on and a few minutes later, two hands touched my back and the coldness I felt erupted into liquid heat that bubbled in my core. But silently sighing as I glanced and smiled at each of the men, saddened because I knew I could no longer act on what I felt.
Chapter 24
Lacey
Icouldn’tbelievewhathad happened to me in such a short length of time, from having nobody in my life apart from Clay to having others, but sharing me and me sharing them. That thought still blew my mind.
I thought I’d already decided about Jack and Blake, but I still spent the past two days thinking it over, the pros and cons of each. But in a nutshell, it was two sets of guys who wanted me to live with them. Wanting me to decide how it would work. Scratch that, Jack and Blake had the whole scenario sorted and sharing two intense men would be easier than sharing four immature ones. Having a gorgeous apartment in the centre of town was also a plus in Jack and Blake’s favour.
When did I get so shallow?
I suppose I didn’t.
Because as much as I really liked Jack and Blake, they still wanted someone else. It saddened me, the more I thought about it because they didn’t say she was their last lover; they said she was their last love. Why did one letter at the end hurt more? I couldn’t get involved. I couldn’t be their girl because I had a feeling they wanted me because I looked similar to the girl in the picture.
I needed for them to want me, not someone else.
I blinked hard as I thought of that. At least I worked it out before it got too late. Though I might not have picked them because of Seb, because if I was truthful to myself, I had something deeper going on with him. I wasn’t sure what it was yet, but there was something there I wanted to explore. So, I’d been avoiding everyone for a few days, thinking it over. Not knowing what to do.
Did I do anything?Would it complicate my life? I still had to find out what happened to my parents.
But would Clay be fine if I stayed in the dorms with Polly? Or should I take my chances with Seb and the others with a long-term view of being only with Seb?
Oh my, I was considering this. I needed to get out and get some fresh air.
“I’m going for a ride Polly,” I shouted at the bathroom door. I needed some space, and think about what they said.
“Wait a minute, I have to speak to you,” she yelled back. The door quickly opened and Polly sprinted out of the bathroom, wrapped in a towel. “Jack wants you to meet him.”
I shook my head, not understanding. “Do you know why?”
“They want you to go to their apartment. They said it’s important.”
I smiled. They’d given me a few days to let me think about their offer, and now they needed to know. But I didn’t want to get Polly involved because it was easier for her and others to think nothing was going on.
“Jack and I are not looking for the same thing.”
“Theywant you.” Her eyes glistened, the corners of her lips were crestfallen. “They want you to be theirs. They’ll look after you, and you’ll live with them.”
“They told you that?” I laughed nervously and rubbed my fingers over my temples. “It’s not what I’m looking for. I’m going for a ride. Tell them I’m not their girl.”
This was getting crazy. If Polly knew then how many people around the campus knew? It would start rumours, especially as the major problem I had with Jack and Blake was everyone knew their reputation. Which for me would be horrendous. I was a future Queen for goodness’ sake, I couldn’t have that type of reputation.
She shook her head. “No, you need to tell them.”
“Okay.” I sighed. “I’ll call him when I get back. I’m going for a ride for an hour before ballet starts.”
She shrugged her shoulders casually. I couldn’t do anything but sigh and turned to walk away.
“You know Lacey…” She hesitated, the sound of a large inhale came from behind me. I turned back to her. “I don’t get you. You have Jack, Blake, Carter and his friends. I can see they all want you, and you’re not interested.”
I blinked and inhaled slowly, then gave her a tight smile. “But they all want more than I can give them and as much as I wanted to hurt Carter, I’ve realised I need to stop hurting myself.” I pressed my hand against my heart. “I hurt too much in here. Romance isn’t high on my agenda. I have other things occupying my mind.”
“Is that why you keep riding that bike?” Her lips turned down and her voice was much softer.
“I’m by myself in my grief. I hide it because nobody wants to listen to someone wallowing and nobody accepts what I think,” I said, and tears sprung to my eyes. “It’s hard, but I’m getting better and at the moment the bike and dancing are the only things that help me feel free of the pain.”