“Be careful, that’s all I ask. If I get a chance, I’ll call Genie and see if she maybe sen
t it or knows something about it. But until then, be alert, okay?” Cradling the phone between my shoulder and ear, I pulled my hair into a haphazard bun.
“I am always careful. I should be telling you these things.”
“Would it do any good?” I had to smile at my own question.
“Non, my foolish girl. It never does.” Her voice had warmed, and I suspected she was smiling too. It was nice to feel weightless for a moment, free from the heavy burden that hung around my neck day in and day out. What I wouldn’t give to feel this light every day. Or if not a day, even an hour.
“Stay safe.” I was struck by the sudden, intense need to see her. With the nagging feeling that something was wrong with that postcard, coupled with the fact I hadn’t seen her since my failed wedding, I just wanted to go home. Not New York home, but home home. “When I’m done here, maybe I’ll take a detour. Come see you.”
“You don’t need to babysit me.”
“No, not like that. I could bring Desmond. We could make a proper visit out of it.”
She made a small hmm noise. “If you are bringing me a man, does that mean he is the man?”
I still wasn’t sure how much of my messy love life my grandmere was privy to, but the way she emphasized the man made me think she knew a lot more than I gave her credit for. Was Desmond the man? After coming home from California, he and Holden had agreed to their uneasy peace. They both still intended to fight for me, but the actual fighting was to be kept at a minimum.
Since then, I hadn’t been the most romantic girlfriend in the world, and I feared instead of keeping them, I was on a fast road to losing them both.
I loved them, and I wasn’t in a position mentally or emotionally to be choosing favorites. Especially since they’d both had a hand in bringing me back from the verge. How could I choose between two men who quite literally saved my life?
At some point I’d have to, or they would decide for me, and I’d end up with neither of them.
But for now, I was keeping that decision as far away from my mind as possible.
“He is a man,” I answered.
She clucked her tongue, the way any good, disapproving parental figure would. “You mustn’t play with the hearts of men. They are more fragile than we are led to believe.”
What could I say to that?
She was right, and I’d been carrying around two of them without much regard for the consequences. If I broke both their hearts, would I know whose was whose? How could I have made such a mess out of everything?
Sometimes the desire to be loved leads people down a foolish road, and instead of finding joy, the only thing we find is misery and loneliness.
So much for my moment of happiness.
Chapter Seven
“You’re grumpy tonight.” Desmond eased a large duffel bag off my shoulder.
“And you figured that observation would cheer me up?” I managed to keep any venom out of my tone, in spite of the fact my feelings were hurt by his statement.
He wasn’t wrong, though. Since hanging up with Grandmere, my mood had taken a downward spiral. I didn’t think Desmond would notice, since my default mood these days was bad, but apparently my grouchy attitude was attaining new heights.
“I’d like to think you’d be more positive about what we’re doing.”
“When we get out, we can find a nice bar and order an obscenely expensive bottle of champagne, okay? I’ll even crack a smile. But until then, this is the version of me you’re stuck with.”
“Great.”
Was that…sarcasm? I gave Desmond a quick look over my shoulder, slowing down so we were evenly matched. In spite of his longer legs, I was in such a hurry to get to the metro station I was outpacing him.
It wasn’t like Desmond to show much attitude, so for him to be outright snarky caught me off-guard. “I’m sorry.” I meant it too. I was sorry for being such a bitch to him, especially after we’d had a good talk the night before. “I had a call from Grandmere, and something she said isn’t sitting right.” Since I knew he’d want me to elaborate, and I wasn’t ready to discuss Grandmere’s opinion on my love life, I added, “Someone sent her a random postcard, and it has me on edge. As soon as we’re done with Peyton, I’d like to go see her. For some peace of mind.”
“Her peace of mind, or yours?”