“And I don’t?” When she let a moment pass without responding, I went on. “I never asked for this kid, and I have no responsibility for her. None. If I can’t find Amanda, I’m sending her to CPS.”
“You’ll find Amanda, Faye. She’s the mom, and mothers love their babies too much to give them up.”
I snorted. That gave me zero hope, considering who I was talking to. “Just tell me if you hear from Amanda.”
We said our goodbyes and hung up.
I slid an arm under Gretchen’s cloth, holding her closer to me. “Nobody wants you, kid. Nobody.”
Her little face squinched up tight, everything but the downy hairs on her head turning a brighter shade of red than they’d been so far. Her mouth opened again, and I braced myself for yet another yell.
And then the scent drifted up to my nose.
How the hell was I supposed to change a diaper?
3
Jaz
I wasn’t planning to bother Dr. Erwin again. I’d done enough of that yesterday.
But I was dying to know what’d happened with the adorable baby I’d held, and her office was only five minutes out of the way as I walked to the library—okay, ten minutes if you count the round trip.
It wasn’t stalking to stroll by and see if anything was going on. I mean, a tiny bit, but I was doing it out of… concern. For the baby’s welfare. Right, we’d call it that.
Nothing to do with the way I’d been utterly fascinated with Dr. Erwin ever since taking her 201 course three years ago. The solemn professor with the magnetic presence, the one who wrote brilliant analyses of the novels I’d loved for years, the one who’d introduced me to even more literature that had now burned its way into the deepest parts of my soul—she didn’t intrigue me in the slightest.
I definitely wasn’t dying to know what she was like when she wasn’t behind the podium in a five-hundred-person lecture hall. Even over our past couple of meetings, I’d pretty much only seen the same serious, intimidatingly intellectual persona. But that couldn’t be all there was to her.
Did I crave any further peeks into the realities of her life? Nope. Not at all.
So I honestly wasn’t planning to bother Dr. Erwin… but as soon as I took my first step into the humanities building, I heard Gretchen screaming her little head off.
I ran through the halls, not even bothering to look before the hairpin turns. I nearly slammed into a student or two before arriving, panting, at Faye’s door.
“It’s-just-my-niece-she’ll-be-out-of-here-soon-I-promise!” she said in one breath.
Gretchen was still in the pink cloth she’d come in, swaddled up so as to suspend her against Faye’s chest. She only looking more pissed as she looked up from her papers and saw it was me. “Jaz Neeson. What are you doing here?”
“I wanted to check in on you,” I said, hovering in the doorway. “Make sure everything was okay.”
“It’s not.” She threw her pen down, and Gretchen squealed at the top of her lungs.
“Hey, whoa. Want to give her to me for a second?”
Her face darkened, but she undid the knot around her neck. “Sure. If you think you can shut her up, have at it. Don’t think you’re the first, though. Every woman in this building’s already tried and failed. Half of them claim to have special mommy magic, but guess what? It doesn’t exist.”
“They don’t know her like I do.” I circled my arms around Gretchen, sliding into a chair to make her feel safer. “Hey there, gorgeous. You missed your auntie Jaz, huh? I missed you, too, but I’m here now.”
“Auntie Jaz,” Faye scoffed—but she was quiet as I kept whispering to Gretchen until she calmed down. “What’s your secret?”
“I don’t know,” I said. “Been told I’m a natural with kids.”
“Hmph.” She tipped her chair back, rubbing a hand over her face as she let out a long exhale. “I apologize if I’m crabby today. Now it’s me who didn’t sleep. She had me up half the night.”
“You said you were going to handle it. I thought you meant you were going to get in touch with her mother.”
“I was.” Faye pursed her lips. “Easier said than done.”