Was this a dream? Or some other plane of reality? It couldn’t be possible that the woman I’d wanted for years was honest-to-goodness fingering me.
The moment went on and on, until my sense of time turned to mush and all I knew was the sensual embrace surrounding me. I no longer knew what Faye was doing to me. I had no words for the things that were happening. My world had narrowed to the pinpoints behind my eyelids and the skilful caress sweeping over my nub.
I seized up and yelled out, the climax possessing me as Faye continued to rub me hard.
When she spoke again, I had no idea what she was talking about. “Oh yeah, it definitely will.”
“Huh?” I struggled for air.
“Your body. Haunt mine.” She set an affectionate hand on my mound—as drained as I was, the touch made me twitch for more.
“I’ll haunt you right now.”
With a sly grin, she rolled onto her back and pulled off her shirt. “Is that what the kids are calling it these days?”
I positioned myself between her legs, determined to send her to the same heights of ecstasy I’d just reached. “You’ll find out, Professor.”
14
Faye
So I’d failed at leaving the ball in Jaz’s court. It seemed to have worked out well enough in the end.
She’d never offered a proper explanation for why she hadn’t made a move on me, but she seemed more than willing to go along with what I’d started.
Who knew why she’d been reluctant that first time? Maybe she’d had other things on her mind. Or maybe it’d all been in my head. That was kind of known to happen from time to time.
In any case, our relationship shifted not-so-subtly in the week leading up to Amanda and Gretchen’s visit. To the world, we were the same as always. But behind my office doors, we exchanged kisses… and gropes. We visited each other’s apartments. One time, we even appropriated an empty classroom for our purposes.
I had the physical relationship I’d craved with the hot younger woman I’d gone after. I should’ve been walking on the clouds.
But something nagged at some deep place in my heart. Was it my concern over Gretchen? Because there was plenty of that. Every time I thought about not having her anymore, my stomach churned and my limbs went weak.
I could identify that concern, though—could deconstruct it, parse it, comprehend it.
I suspected there was more to this odd feeling. That it was something to do with Jaz.
It’s a funny thing, that physical stuff. You think you can keep it casual only. No problem. That you can separate lust from love, and that you’d never get caught up in feelings when all you’re trying to do is find release.
But sometimes it sneaks up on you.
Sometimes you catch yourself thinking about them when they’re not around. Not just once, but all the time. And not just dirty thoughts, either.
Sometimes the flash of a grin makes your knees go unsteady, and you realize you’d do anything to see her smile again.
Sometimes you’re kissing someone and you wonder when she last kissed anyone else. And the thought makes you anxious, and you can’t explain why.
And your heart clenches up, and you don’t want her to kiss anyone but you ever again.
* * *
“It’s still 12:27,” Jaz said. “You can leave in twenty minutes.”
I twisted my watch around to the other side of my wrist. Of course she’d caught me peeking at it. “Am I that obvious?”
Jaz swung her legs from my lap down to the foot of the couch. “You’re nervous. It’s understandable.”
I guessed it was. This meeting with Amanda had been weighing on my mind more than I cared to admit. I’d spent most of the past week wishing I could just skip the anxiety and fast-forward to the point when it would be over. However the coffee date would end up, I just wanted to know, already.