Don’t push too hard. Don’t scare her off. Do this on her schedule.
“Next weekend sounds great.” I forced a smile.
13
Jaz
“Peek-a-boo,” I said, holding my hands in front of Gretchen’s face and taking them away. “Peek-a-boo!”
She wriggled and squealed. She was in her softest pink plush onesie, a matching pink hat pulled over her fuzzy head.
I glanced at the time on my phone, wishing a new message would arrive. Faye’s meeting with her sister had already gone on for an hour, and I wasn’t sure if that was good or bad.
Then again, I couldn’t quite decide what I wanted her to get out of the meeting.
I waved my hands over Gretchen’s face again, my heart clenching as I realized this could be our last time playing together. If this Amanda person was as spontaneous as she seemed, maybe she’d change her mind and whisk Gretchen away with her.
And while that might—or might not—have been best for Gretchen, I wasn’t ready to let this gorgeous baby out of my life. I was already dying to know what she’d be like at five, or ten, or twenty. Hell, where would she be when she was my age? Would she be into poetry? Would she be working on her masters, too?
Giving Gretchen a tap on the nose, I laughed at myself. The kid couldn’t even talk, and I was planning an entire career for her.
I just wanted so much for her. She might be getting a strange start on life, but I was sure she was going to do great despite all of that. And I’d do everything I could to help her get there.
My phone rang, and I picked up with a racing heart. “Hello?”
“Are you at home? I can come by in ten minutes to pick up Gretchen.”
“Okay. What happened?”
Faye sounded strained. “I’ll tell you when I get there.”
I wanted to whine and yell—I was dying from the suspense—but I hung up without a word of complaint. Faye had no obligation to tell me a thing. This was her life, her family. I had no horse in the race… except my concern for Gretchen.
When Faye got there, I was waiting at the door with Gretchen and her bag all packed up. The exhausted look on Faye’s face told me not to ask questions. Happily, she ignored the bag and came inside.
She’d been over to my place a few t
imes now. It was about the same size as hers, except I shared it with two roommates who were also grad students. They were out at the moment, it being a Saturday afternoon, so Faye and I sat down on the couch.
“So?” I asked quietly.
She filled me in—Amanda’s recalcitrance, the new details on Gretchen’s parentage, the possibility of adoption, and the agreement that Amanda would come visit Gretchen.
“But not until next week,” she finished.
“Why not? Did she say?”
“No. She seems almost scared. Maybe she needs time to prepare herself.”
“I guess it would be a big deal for her.”
Faye sighed and slumped sideways until her head was on my shoulder. Startled, I stiffened—then put my arm around her. “Hey, it’s okay.” My pulse was racing at the physical contact, the first we’d had in some time. Did this mean something? Did she want something between us after all?
“I know it’s okay,” she said into my shoulder. “It’s just a lot to take.”
I rubbed her back. If she was only doing this for comfort, I could give her comfort.
Despite the growing situation taking place between my legs. A situation that was completely inappropriate considering that there was a month-old baby lying on the table a foot away from us.