I remember that man in the warehouse, what feels like so long ago now, looking at me as I stared down the barrel of a gun, knowing that in a matter of seconds, he would cease to exist. Knowing that I would kill him, even though I’d never met him, didn’t even know for sure if what I was being told about his crimes was true, simply because I’d been told to do it.
I imagine it being Cayde at the other end of that gun, looking at me with betrayal in his eyes. I imagine myself pulling the trigger, ending my best friend’s life because I was told to because he had had the audacity not to give in when I’d said the game was over. Because he’d fought for the town. For Athena.
I imagine it being Athena at the other end of it.
Slowly, hardly realizing that I’m really doing it, I push myself to my feet.
“Sit down, son.” My father glares at me. “I’m not done with you—”
“Yes, you are.” The bitterness in my voice startles even me. “I’m sick of being beholden to thefamily legacy.I’m sick of being told who to fuck, who to kill, who to marry, like some kind of sick twisted party game come to life.”
My father is frozen in place, staring at me in shock. He doesn’t say a word, as if he’s completely taken aback, and I take full advantage of that to barrel forward.
“I fucking hate Winter Romero,” I tell him bluntly. “I don’t want to marry her, I don’t want to fuck her, I don’t want to have children with her. I don’t want her anywhere near me if I had my choice. And that’s just the first of the things I don’t fucking want to deal with anymore. I’m making my own choices now. And killing Cayde won’t ever be one of them.”
He seems to recover a little, glaring at me. “Would you rather have Athena?” he asks snidely, his voice taunting. “A girl who let another guy, this supposed ‘brother’ of yours, rail her in front of most of the school campus? A girl who has shown she has no respect for you, our traditions, or our family?”
I shrug, stepping away from the table and shoving the chair back under it. I’m not staying in this fucking house one second more. “At least Athena knows who she is,” I say flatly. “At least she makes her own decisions. And now I will be, too.”
My heart is hammering in my chest as I turn on my heel, stalking out of the dining room. I hear the sound of my father’s chair shoving back, his voice calling out after me, shouting my name, but I don’t turn around or look back. I keep going, out of the house, out into the crisp fall air, and towards my car, waiting for me in the circular drive.
I grit my teeth against the oncoming headache as I slide into the driver’s seat and rev the engine, my head throbbing with the rush of adrenaline. I wish I had Athena next to me now, so I could order her to help take the edge off, order her to suck my cock the way she did that afternoon when we left the country club.
I’ve never been a rebel. Cayde was always the angry one, Jaxon was always the rebellious one. I was the one who fit the mold, elegant and sophisticated, not a hair out of place, not a wrinkle in my uniform, devoted to my family and the traditions I’d been raised with. But as the minute's pass and my anger grows instead of ebbing, I know I’m on the verge of being entirely done with all of that.
My father made me kill a man weeks after graduating high school.That’s fucked up, I realize, my hands tightening on the steering wheel as my foot presses down on the gas, the car speeding up well over the limit as I drive back towards campus the long way.
Jaxon was always the one who talked about how life could be different without these responsibilities, who wanted nothing to do with our legacy or the town. But I see it differently. I don’t want to leave, but I can’t help but wonder now if there’s a possibility for things to be different for everyone. If the way things have always been done isn’t necessarily the way they should be.
I have a sudden memory of being about fifteen and seeing Cayde’s bare back in the locker room at school. He was always careful not to change in front of everyone, and I’d always thought he was just shy. But one day, he’d stripped off his shirt when he thought no one was looking, and I’d caught a glimpse of the black and blue welts across his back, scabbed over, crisscrossing over old healed scar tissue.
The sight of it had made me want to throw up. I’d known better, from the look on his face, than to say anything or ask how the marks had gotten there. I’d turned away, and I’ve never really known what he thought of my reaction. I only know that later, looking back on it as an adult, it felt like cowardice.
Refusing to stand up for him now, when my father seems determined to secure our family’s supremacy no matter the cost, feels like an even more cowardly act.
My mood is particularly dark by the time I pull into the driveway. It only blackens even more when I see a white convertible already parked there and a familiar red-haired girl in a denim miniskirt leaning up against it.
“What thefuckare you doing here?” I snarl before I’m all the way out of the car, glaring at her as I slam the driver’s door shut. “No one invited you here, Winter.”
“Is that any way to talk to your future wife?” She flips her hair, grinning at me. “I came to talk to you about what happened at the party. I would have come sooner, but I heard you weresobusy nursing your pampered little pet back to health. Honestly, things would have been so much easier if she’d just died. Don’t you agree?”
I’ve never moved so fast in my life. Cayde’s the athlete, not me. But Winter’s attitude only fans the flames that are burning in my gut right now, hot and angry.
“No,” I hiss, my hand around her throat as I pin her against the side of her car, pressing hard enough to get my point across. “I don’t agree. And if you haven’t figured out by now that I won’t tolerate Athena being treated poorly, I think another lesson might be needed.”
Winter glares at me, the fear that I’d hoped to see in her eyes missing. “You punished Athena for doing exactly what you’re doing right now,” she manages, her voice choked from the pressure on her throat. “I’m getting very sick of being strangled up against surfaces.”
“Then maybe you should watch your mouth.” I glare at her. “You could ask Athena what I do to pretty girls who run their mouths when they shouldn’t.” My gaze flicks over her face. “You look like a girl who’s had a decent amount of cum on your face, but mine hasn’t been there yet. Maybe it should be, to remindyouof your place, too.”
This is when my cock should stir to life, when I should feel myself hard and throbbing, ready to make good on my promise. Sometimes just the sight of Athena’s delicate face is enough to make me hard, just the thought of all the times I’ve coated her skin with my cum, felt her full lips purse around my cockhead just before I pull it free and let loose on that pretty face. But I’m limp as hell, my dick embarrassingly soft. Not even the growing look of fear in Winter’s eyes or the feeling of her delicate neck under my fingers seems to be enough to change that.
“You watched your little girlfriend get fucked by your best friend in front of basically the entire campus,” she hisses. “You really still give a shit about her after that? She’s really what you want?” Her hand shoots out, grabbing me between the legs, massaging my soft cock. “Get it up for me, Dean. Show me what you really want. Who knows? Maybe I can do for you what Athena does. But I’ll never betray you like that little slut. I’ll never fuck your best friend while you watch. I’ll be yours. Only yours. And I’m promised to you—”
“I’m breaking that promise.” I lunge forward, slanting my mouth over hers as I crush her against the car, her hand tightening on my balls as I force my tongue into her mouth. She tastes like iced coffee, her sickly-sweet designer perfume filling my nostrils. There’s not so much as a twitch in my groin, no reaction to her fingers massaging my length far too expertly for someone who claims to be so devoted to me. I thrust my hips into her hand, half wanting my cock to get hard because if I could just want her, my life would be so much fucking easier. If Winter made me crazy with lust the way Athena does, if the sight and scent and touch of her made me so hard that my dick felt like it might break in two, then I could do what’s expected of me.
But it doesn’t. I used to never care very much whether or not Ilikeda girl. A pretty face and a fit body, and a tight pussy was enough for me. But Athena seems to have changed all of that.
Winter twists her mouth away from mine, her face hurt. “You’re not even getting hard,” she whimpers, her pink lipstick smeared over her lips. “What’s wrong, Dean? You can’t be that obsessed with that little slut—”