I’m close too, just from watching and touching her. I feel her go tense under my hands, her legs squeezing together and then splaying again as she tosses her head back, her climax shuddering over her as she grips the side of the table with one hand and squeezes my cock with the other. She cries out my name, her clit pulsing under my fingers. The second her orgasm starts to ebb, I turn sharply, grabbing her hair and pushing her head towards me as I thrust my swollen cockhead against her lips.
Her mouth opens eagerly, taking me in, and she starts to suck—but even that is more than I can take after the sheer eroticism of what we just did. I explode almost immediately into her mouth, groaning as my cum shoots over her tongue. My climax only intensified by the way Saoirse swallows eagerly, taking every drop as I thrust into her mouth.
I groan, shuddering, and I know at that moment that I’ve let this go too far.
I’m on the verge of breaking my own bargain with the woman I married.
7
SAOIRSE
I’m still in a daze when Connor and I return to the room to get changed before our hike. I’d booked the massage with the intent of it being just that—a massage, but it had turned into something else entirely. I can still feel the unfamiliar sensation of the warm stone against my skin, pushinginsideof me, and a ripple of electric thrill runs over and through me at the memory.
Connor is the kind of man I never would have dreamed of marrying. He’s not even the kind of man I’d thought he would be when I went to London with my father. He’s adventurous, daring, filthily sexual, and he’s awakened parts of me that I didn’t even know existed.
I don’t want this weekend to end. I don’t want any of it to end. I wanthim, and I’m more and more afraid, with everything I learn about him and every experience we have together, that I’m falling in love with him.
I’ve barely thought about Niall while we were here. It’s been just us, me and Connor, and I haven’t wanted it any other way. I feel like I’m counting the hours we have left—just tonight and tomorrow, and then we’ll fly home. Things will go back to the way they were before, and that leaves an ache in my chest that I feel like I can’t shake.
I’m quiet as I slip into my leggings and top and boots for hiking, and if Connor notices, he doesn’t say anything. We head out to where the guide is waiting for us, and I fight the urge to slip my hand into Connor’s as we start down the trail. I could—we’d agreed to do things like that this weekend—but the fear is coming back. Fear that I’m just going to hurt myself more in the end by all of this.
But then, to my surprise, it’s Connor who brushes his broad hand against mine, his fingers slipping in between mine as he walks next to me, as casually as if it were a normal thing for him to do.
My heart skips a beat in my chest, and for an instant, I consider pulling my hand away. Protecting myself. But something tells me that if I do, the elaborate pretense we’ve built this weekend will come crashing down. Connor taking my hand of his own free will is a gesture, and if I reject it, we’ll immediately go back to the way we were before. We’ll finish out this trip cold and distant, probably fucking, but not the way we have been. The fantasy will be over.
I don’t want that. So I resist the urge to pull my hand away, and we walk down the path together.
Fuji National Park is gorgeous, beyond anything I’ve ever seen. My family isn’t exactly the roughing it type, but we did go to Yellowstone one year when I was younger. We stayed in a very expensive Air B&B, and my mother called it “glamping,” in a tone that suggested even that was beneath her. Maggie and I went to Joshua Tree one summer, once again, “glamping.” I rode a horse down that beach in Dublin with Connor.
Nothing I’ve seen has ever compared to this, though.
When we stop on a rocky beach, Mt. Fuji in the distance, unbelievably clear water lapping at the shore a few inches from our feet, Connor turns me towards him. Our hiking guide drifts a little ways off, giving us space, but I don’t doubt that Connor wouldn’t care either way.
He tips my chin up with one hand, his other still intertwined with mine, and when he kisses me, it feels as if the entire world comes grinding to a halt.
I don’t have a lot of experience with kissing. There were a couple of cold, chaste kisses with Liam that I didn’t even count, and then since Connor, I’ve kissed Niall quite thoroughly. Niall is an incredible kisser, generous and passionate, but nothing compares to the way Connor’s lips feel on mine.
He makes me feel things that I didn’t even know were possible.
I lose track of time as he kisses me. The warm breeze ruffles my hair, blowing it around my face and his as he kisses me slowly, almost lazily, as if we had all the time in the world. His hand drops from my cheek and slides over my waist, his arm wrapping around me to pull me closer. He feels solid, warm, aroused against my thigh but not intensely so, as if he’s enjoying the simple pleasure of the kiss as well, not thinking ahead to where it could go.
Not that itcouldgo anywhere, with our guide just a few yards away. I don’t think even Connor would attempt that.
I wish, as he kisses me that there was some way to snap a photo of this, so I could remember it forever. I try to capture it in my head—the scenery around us, the feeling of his hands and lips, every part of this moment, so I can recall it long after it’s gone.
When Connor pulls away, I feel breathless. He doesn’t say anything, but as we go to continue our hike, he doesn’t let go of my hand, either.
I half expect him to pounce on me when we finally make it back to our hotel room, sweaty and tired. “Let’s skip going out to Tokyo tonight,” I blurt, biting my lower lip. “We’ll reserve the downstairs onsen and private bartender—we can eat there instead and go into the city tomorrow. I’m tired, and I’m sure you are too—”
Connor looks at me curiously. “Are you sure?” he asks. “I don’t want you to feel like you’ve missed out on anything this weekend.”
Something about his words strikes me the wrong way, as if everything he’s been doing has been calculated to make sure I’m getting the maximum out of our “deal.” A retort is on the tip of my tongue, but I bite it back. Once again, I don’t want to ruin our fragile peace. I don’t want this to end yet.
“I’m sure,” I say softly instead. “A night in sounds nice.”
“Okay.” Connor runs one hand through his hair. “We’ll have dinner, and then I actually wanted to make time to meet a friend in Tokyo, if I was able to at any point. What if I do that after dinner and then come back for the late-night onsen and drinks?”
I pause, biting my lower lip. “Sure,” I say finally, feeling hesitant. I’d wanted Connor all to myself this weekend. But it might be good to have a few hours alone to get my thoughts in order and keep from falling too deeply under the spell of what we have going on here. “Actually,” I say after a moment’s thought, “why don’t you go ahead and go? I could use a nap. We’ll have a late dinner.”