CHAPTER28
We stayed in the tub for a long, long time; I think I emptied and refilled it three times. I washed her hair before making her stand in the shower to rinse; she was still so weak I had to prop her against my chest to hold her up while I took care of her. I hadn't quite thought this shit through because neither of us had any clean clothes, and whereas I could jump back in my cargo pants, her clothes were another story.
I found a robe for her and, without stopping to think too much about it, took her up the stairs to my private rooms. If we were going to do this, we were going to need all the alone time we could get. I was sure my family was just being polite by leaving us alone for now, but fuck knows how long that shit would last.
After sitting her on the lounger, I sent off a rapid text to Tiffany asking her to get Suzette some stuff; she would know what to get; she'd dragged poor Butterfly off shopping against her will more times than I could count. My sister is a clotheshorse, just saying.
I needed to go see about some food but didn't want to leave her, so I did the next best thing.
"Hey, mom, could you do us a favor?"
"Gage, when did you leave the house?"
"I didn't, mom. We're upstairs; I just don't want to leave Suzette right now. Can you bring us up some food?" I looked over to make sure she was okay. She was picking at the edge of the robe with a far away look on her face. At least her fucking color was up a little.
"Gotcha, son, I'll get right on it; soup and sandwiches, okay?"
"Yeah, that sounds good; thanks mom, love you."
"I love you too, son." We hung up, and I went back over to butterfly.
"Suzette, babe, can you look at me?" She looked at me warily as if expecting me to knock her down or some shit; I hated the fuck out of that; I was supposed to be the protector, not the thing she feared.
"Babe, we're going to have to talk about this... no, don't tense up, just hear me out." I had to think really hard about what I wanted to say. I couldn't afford another fuck up.
"I've made a decision, but I want you to know that in order for us to get past this, we're gonna need to talk about it; there's no other way. We need to be as honest with each other as possible, that's the only way this is gonna work, and you have to understand that I'm gonna get angry; it's only natural. Put yourself in my place; how would you react?"
"Are you going to leave me?"
I took a deep breath and released; this was probably the most important decision of my fucking life.
"No, I'm not leaving you." Fuck that felt great.
* * *
She seemedto relax after I told her I wasn't leaving. I have to admit it took a load off my mind as well. I'd been stressing like a motherfucker over this decision for damn near two weeks, and when it came down to it, it was just a matter of admitting it out loud. I loved her. Still, I wish none of this had happened, I wish our lives had played out the way I'd always dreamt, but this is the hand we’d been dealt.
This would always be a part of us now, hopefully not the biggest part. Hopefully, we can both move on.
This was going to cause a shit storm in the media; I didn't foresee any privacy for at least the rest of the fucking year, but before any of that could happen, there was still a little matter of revenge. Just because I'd forgiven her didn't mean those two fucks were off the hook. I had no doubt James would have what we needed in a few days. They didn't call him the hunter for nothing. He got the job done.
After that was taken care of, then we could rebuild our lives. I would never be able to move the fuck on if they didn't pay for their part in this.
There was no room for small talk, so I just jumped right in.
"So you said they lied and told you I was having an affair was there anything else going on?"
She shook her head in the negative if this shit was going to work, she was going to have to open up.
I was barely holding on to my temper as it is just thinking about this fuckery made me see red, but it was a necessary evil, and she had to see that, or we were lost.
I understood her hesitancy; after all, when the smoke cleared, she did look guilty as fuck. And there was something that had been bothering the fuck out of me.
"What were you thinking that day in those pictures?" She fidgeted uncomfortably before looking in my general direction.
"I don't know."
"That's not an answer, Suzette; what, Were, You, Thinking?"