Ari
“What’sallthis?”
A bittersweet ache filled my chest as Daddy entered the dining room, where I’d set the table for us. He'd changed into one of those sweatpants that always fucked with my brain cells, and that hadn’t changed, even though he’d aged considerably in the last four years. I didn’t recall the lines bracketing the corners of his mouth being that deep. His hair was more silver now too at the sides, and the six-pack he always joked he would have one day seemed nothing but a distant memory.
I liked it. He reminded me of home and how much I missed it when my mother had kicked me out.
“I set the table the way I remember you liked it.” I placed the last utensil on the table and stepped back to admire my handiwork. Just like old times. Almost. I cocked my ears. Nothing but the refreshing silence of my mother’s absence.
“You didn’t have to go through all this trouble, Ari,” Daddy said. He stared at me constantly as if he had trouble believing I was here. “We could have eaten in the kitchen. Less fuss that way.”
“But you like when we eat as a family, remember?” He always insisted on it. It didn't matter that my mother and I didn’t get along. When it came to mealtimes, he didn’t want to hear any excuses. He would give in for breakfast but never dinner.
“That was a long time ago.”
“Too long,” I agreed, unable to fully keep the bitter edge out of my voice. “But I’m here now. Sit. I’ll get everything from the kitchen.”
I breezed by him and grabbed the salad and gravy bowls. Instead of taking a seat, he followed me into the kitchen.
"The least I can do is help."
I opened my mouth to argue, but at the gentle smile on his face, I nodded. That smile was the reason I'd stayed, even though I’d known better. I should have left before he came home from work, but I needed to see him and catch more than a glimpse this time.
Together we brought out everything to the dining room, then took our seats across from each other. I'd deliberately set a place for myself where Mom usually sat. This was my place now. For as long as I was here. When Shaw didn't comment on it, I knew I was right, even if it would take him a while to catch on.
"Are we expecting company?" Shaw chuckled. "This is enough to feed a small army."
"I might have gone a bit overboard," I said sheepishly. "If your neighbor wasn't such an asshole to you all the time, you could share the leftovers with him."
Silence fell over the table, and I glanced up from piling food on my plate.
"What? He still giving you a hard time?"
"Murray died a little over a year ago," he replied, and I could have kicked myself for bringing up the man. This wasn't exactly the atmosphere I wanted for our first dinner with me being back.
Are you really back, though?
I ignored my conscience. I had done it my entire life, so it wasn’t so hard to do, especially given the past four years.
"I thought you'd be happy he's finally not making trouble for you.”
The man had done everything to get to Shaw. From dumping his garbage into ours to killing our family pet, who'd crossed over into his yard. I hadno remorse for him after what he'd done to poor Lilac. Our dog hadn't just died. He'd suffered.
"But the way he died…"
"How'd it happen?" I asked.
"It's too gory."
"Please. I'm not the same little boy you knew. I'm all grown up, and trust me, I have seen too gory."
Too much.
Again I'd said way too much.
He stared right at me with a deep frown. Had he figured out the truth yet?
"I'm sure it's a coincidence," he said. "Remember how we found Lilac before we had to put her down?"