I raised an eyebrow at the innocent tone of the question. I waved her forward. “Come on. Ask what you really want to ask,” I said with a laugh.
Monica giggled. “Fine, you caught me. I’m dying to know what’s up with you and Bryce? You’ve been spending a lot of time together…” She waggled her eyebrows with the insinuation.
I shook my head, trying to consider my words. How could I answer so I wasn’t untruthful, but also so I didn’t blow our cover? “I don’t know, Mon. We’re just…enjoying the time, I guess.”
Monica scoffed. “That’s a copout. You guys are perfect for each other. Everybody knows you should be together forever. Heck, Bryce has known it since high school.”
I felt my brow furrow. “What do you mean? We were never a thing in high school.” I waved a hand. “Sure, we talked about it a little right before I left. But it wasn’t anything serious. Just a crush.”
Monica’s eyes widened. “You really have no clue, do you?”
I stared at her blankly. “About what?”
“I was with Bryce a few days after graduation. He was all fired up and almost too excited to talk. I finally got it out of him, though. He spent all of his graduation money on a ring to propose to you.” Monica clicked her tongue. “I don’t know what he was thinking. That he would admit his feelings and the two of you would ride off into the sunset together at eighteen, I guess?”
I blinked, processing her words. “He had a ring? Are you sure?”
Monica nodded. “Mmm-hmm. He showed it to me. Said he was sure there would never be anyone else for him.”
I stared at the wall behind her, trying to remember. “He never said anything. I mean, he kissed me. But it wasn’t…” I trailed off. It had been sweet. Tempting.
But my focus had already been elsewhere.
Monica shrugged, pulling my attention back to her. “I don’t know what to tell you. He was head over heels for you back then. And if you ask me, he still is. Or is again. I’m not sure. He was pretty torn up when you left…” Monica’s tone became sad. “He hid it well, though. Most people probably didn’t notice.”
“But you did,” I said.
“I did,” she confirmed. “He missed you.”
I nodded and took a bite of my cookie, not speaking my response.
I’d missed him too.
What was I doing?
As much as Bryce claimed we were just pretending, I wasn’t sure that was true. If he’d really been prepared to propose back then, could he really keep his emotional distance when we were constantly thrown into situations that required us to act like we were closer than ever?
Even worse, I was beginning to think maybe it wasn’t Bryce who had to worry about protecting his heart. It was starting to feel like I was the one finding it hard to see the line between my real feelings and our fake relationship.