don’t-mind-if-you-do?
When asking, “What are
you thinking?” is your go-to
icebreaker question.
Does a “naked mud
dance” sound like a great way to
commune with nature?
Do you find yourself
wondering why songs don’t have
more ukulele?
You are accused of
making uncomfortably
lengthy eye contact.
If you’ve gone out a
dozen times and still don’t know
if you’re dating her.
You obsessively
Google prospective dates in
the guise of “research.”
You play flag football
but are, by every other
measure, an adult.
Do you own more than
one vest that your mother did
not purchase for you?
You have developed
unhealthy attachments to
several baristas.
The only “doctors”
you are familiar with are