Before she could say anything else and before I could think things through, I leaned in close to her, cupped her face with my hands, then gently kissed her on the lips. Her quick inhale of breath made me pause, her body stiffening under my touch until she finally melted in my embrace.
At first, I was sure I’d done something wrong. I’d stepped over the line between friends and something more. Something unnatural.
But then she settled back down, took me in her arms, and kissed me back.
And god if it didn’t make my heart race.
It was soft, light, and not at all what I’d come to expect after seeing her at the end of one of her make-out sessions.
Strangely enough, that didn’t bother me. In fact, her lack of aggression made it better. Not only because she was kissing me but because of how she held me. She didn’t hesitate, but she didn’t push me, either.
She simply fell into my embrace, melding her body against my own as she deepened our kiss.
If I thought the room felt warm before, it was boiling now.
Heat rush into my cheeks, my chest tightened, and after what felt like the longest kiss known to mankind, we separated.
Slightly out of breath and sounding just as giddy as I felt, Taylor pressed her forehead to mine and absently ran her
fingers through my hair. “I’ve wanted to do that for the longest time.”
I leaned into her, closing my eyes until the room stopped spinning around us. “Same.”
She drew back so she could meet my gaze. “What took you so long?” There was no mistaking the hurt in her voice.
“You were always with someone else,” I said, sitting up before placing my hands in my lap. “I figured I wasn’t your type.”
She frowned, then ran the backs of her fingertips against my cheek. “They were a distraction. Terrible ones too.”
“You seemed to enjoy yourself.” Hell, the last woman she’d been with, while short-lived, had her laughing all of the time. I thought she was happy.
“It was an act,” she assured me. “I wanted you to think I was happy.” She shook her head at that. “I don’t know why, and it sounds really stupid now.”
I turned so I was facing her and folded my legs underneath of me. “What about you? Why didn’t you ever say anything?”
There were countless times when she’d had the chance, times when I thought—when I wished she’d say it but never did.
“Because eventually, you’ll have to go home.” She didn’t look at me then, staring at the few embers left inside the fireplace instead.
My heart sank. “So you didn’t want to give us a chance because I might go back home at the end of the year? I have to come back here, you know.” I still had a few years before I could finish my degree. I could transfer, of course, but considering the person I was with…
“Yeah, but what about after college? I just… I’ve been hurt before. I started my longest relationship toward the beginning of high school. Things were going great, but then she moved after our senior prom. She didn’t move far, and while we gave it a go, things ended worse than if we’d broken up before she left.”
“You don’t mean that.” Surely the long-distance thing didn’t bother her that much. “If you don’t mind my asking, why break it off?”
“She started seeing someone before we even broke things off. She actually told me she met someone else and that we had to stop seeing one another over the phone. She ended up mailing back my things in an old shoebox.”
“Ouch, that’s harsh.”
“In any case, I could see we’d be a good thing, maybe even great, but I just… I can’t do the long-distance thing again.”
I nodded, and as badly as I wanted to kiss her again and take her in my arms, I kept to myself. “But you kissed me back.”
“I did,” she said with a shy smile.
“So what does that mean? If I’m going to be here with you for an entire month, I’d like to know where we stand. You could’ve pushed me away or told me I overstepped. I would’ve understood.”
“But I didn’t want to do any of those things,” she said without looking at me. “It’s selfish, all right?