She heard herself speak before she knew what she was saying. Her skin turned to ice as she tried to remove the
poached eggs without breaking them, a di cult feat considering the sudden tremble in her hands.
“Who’s Jay?” Alex asked as she took a gulp of juice. “An ex who fell in love with your French toast?”
Charlotte tried to laugh, but it was like choking on her own saliva. “Not quite.” Positioning the eggs over the hash, Charlotte’s mind raced. “Jay is a childhood friend,” she explained after a beat. “We haven’t talked much recently,”
she added, choosing her words carefully so she didn’t feel so much like a liar.
Before Alex could ask any follow up questions, Charlotte changed topics. “Try the sauce,” she demanded, setting the small bowl on the counter while Alex slid onto the stool.
“Tell me if it’s too much.”
As soon as Charlotte set the plates in front of them, Alex went for her fork. The vibrant orange sauce drizzled over the white eggs resting on the roasted sweet potatoes really did make for an impressive sight.
Alex closed her eyes and groaned after she placed a forkful in her mouth. “Ugh, this is amazing.”
Charlotte smiled but didn’t wallow in the satisfaction. She didn’t want to talk about food and risk any follow-up questions about Jayson.
“Do you still have to help Greg with the horse later?” she asked, recalling the conversation from the night before.
Alex’s elderly neighbor had called asking for a hand.
Apparently, his health had been failing, but she’d convinced him to let her help when he needed it.
It took fewer than three questions to get Alex o on a roll about horses. She was just like Jayson with sports. Once she
got going, Alex was a self-propelled conversation engine.
The connection was a kick to the teeth. What would Alex and Jayson think of each other? How would this have played out in another universe?
Omitting the truth was starting to feel more and more like a bold-faced lie. She pushed the food around on her plate while Alex added more spicy sauce to hers.
What if she told her? What if she told her everything about Jayson, about how she came to answer her ad? Maybe they could figure a way out of this together? Charlotte banished the thoughts. It would be an exercise in supreme selfishness to ask Alex for help getting out of something she created.
“Don’t you like it?” Alex asked, searching Charlotte’s face.
“It’s a little spicy,” she replied with a smile. Another lie to add to the growing pile.
Alex’s smile sliced through her heart and the tiny wink squeezed her lungs. “Since when don’t you like it hot?”
Charlotte tried to smile again but it was painful. She couldn’t formulate a joke to play along. There was nothing but the delicious breakfast that tasted like bitter dirt on her tongue.
IN THE DARKNESS of Alex’s bedroom, Charlotte lay awake staring at the ceiling. Well, she would’ve been staring at the ceiling if Alex’s shades didn’t make it pitch black.
It was quiet too. Nothing but the sound of Alex’s deep breathing. Charlotte didn’t know how long she’d been listening to it. The rhythm usually soothed her and lulled her back to sleep, but tonight it was a steady accusation. Each soft exhale was another jab to Charlotte’s heart.
She heard Jayson’s voice in her head. Shit, Charlie. You got it this bad?
Charlotte clenched her jaw. She didn’t know when or how, but she’d developed serious feelings for Alex. The ache in her chest dripped into her stomach, landing like acid and pooling in her guts.
There was no way around it. Charlotte had to confess. She had to tell Alex the truth. It would give her time to shore things up. Freeze operations for a while if necessary.
Anything to avoid getting caught.
Before she could move a muscle, Jayson’s dimpled smile materialized in her mind. Telling Alex would mean sabotaging his e orts. Would he understand? Doubt made her temples throb.
He’d have other chances at big cases. It didn’t have to be this one. It didn’t have to be the case that wrecked so many innocent lives. Alex and her people weren’t real criminals.