Charlotte picked at the label on the bottle instead of her nails. “Come on, you know I haven’t cried since 2007,” she tried to joke.
“Leslie was the realest. She didn’t deserve to go out like that,” he agreed, his face somber.
With a smile she recalled the night they’d snuck into a movie theater to watch Bridge to Terabithia when they didn’t have money for tickets. Jayson hadn’t made fun of her for wanting to watch a kid’s movie, but she’d had to promise to see Transformers with him when it came out later that summer. If he’d been confused as to why a fourteen-year-old wanted to see something suited for pre-teens, he was really at a loss why she wanted to see something so sad. She couldn’t explain that it was the only way to make herself cry, to release the hurt and the fear and the anger festering within and threatening to poison her from the inside.
Unfortunately, it was the last time it worked.
“What aren’t you telling me?” he asked, copper brown eyes gleaming with worry.
She wanted to open her mouth and pour out everything she’d been through in the last eight months. She wanted him to help her make sense of it. Help her untangle the confusing feelings whirling around her chest and catching in tangles and snarls. Nothing came out.
“I just really want to do a good job,” she replied after a while. She wanted him to see beyond the simplicity of her words. Wished he guessed at the conflict warring between her head and her heart.
He relaxed his shoulders and reached for his beer. “I know. Unfortunately, this is just a sit and wait situation. Do
you feel like you might be getting closer?”
Charlotte nodded. “It feels like something is about to break.”
“All you have to do is be there when it does, okay? That’s it.”
Charlotte resisted the urge to laugh. It would have been a bitter, humorless thing. There was no way she could miss the break when she was the one who was going to shatter.
Jayson changed the subject and started telling her about a woman he’d started seeing. They’d only been on a few dates, but they’d been vibing really well. She was happy for him.
Jayson was a good, loving person and deserved to be happy.
Would he feel the same about her no matter who she was falling for?
“I have to go soon,” he said, glancing at his watch.
“A date with Felicity?” she joked.
“She wants to try Korean barbecue,” he explained with a smile.
She poked him in the ribs as she stood. “I’m sure that’s not all she wants to try.”
Lingering by the door with his hat in his hand, Jayson looked at her again. “Are you sure everything is okay? If this is getting to you, everybody will understand —”
Charlotte reached up on her tippy toes to hug him. “I just miss you, that’s all.”
“Charlie, if you’re in over your head, all you have to do is tell me,” he whispered, locking her in a bear hug. “I’ll get you out of it.”
“I don’t want out,” she managed despite the massive lump in her throat. She didn’t know how to explain what she
wanted. It was such a jumbled mess of gray.
Unconvinced, Jayson let her go. A moment later she was back in her apartment. Sometime after that, Jayson crossed her window as he jogged toward the stairs. With a hoodie on and his hat pulled down low, he was unidentifiable before slipping into the shadows.
CHAPTER 33
A FITFUL NIGHT’S sleep and too much co ee meant a jittery Charlotte was staring at her work computer with dry, irritated eyes. Scanning spreadsheet after spreadsheet, she searched for ways to cover Alex’s tracks. It hadn’t started as a conscious choice, but after a while her hands had started moving of their own volition.
She debated changing their record keeping system from names to randomly generated employee and client numbers, which would make patterns harder to see. If the spa invested in new software, that would provide an innocent reason for the sudden change in the books. Nothing suspicious about upgrading and modernizing.
They really can’t prove anything , she told herself as she pulled the records apart. No service was o ered o the books, and no one was paid under the table. Charlotte even corrected rounding errors. Every dollar that came into the spa was accounted for.
Like Alex said, the only thing anyone might